View Full Version : Quote of the Day
The artist doesn't have time to listen to the critics. The ones who want to be writers read the reviews, the ones who want to write don't have the time to read reviews. ~William Faulkner (1897 - 1962)
The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong it usually turns out to be impossible to get at or repair. ~Douglas Adams (1952 - 2001), Mostly Harmless
Committee--a group of men who individually can do nothing but as a group decide that nothing can be done.
~ Fred Allen (1894 - 1956)
and for all the yesterdays that have gone by here are a few I got to put in:
I am not in this world to live up to other people's expectations, nor do I feel that the world must live up to mine.
~ Fritz Perls
The great French Marshall Lyautey once asked his gardener to plant a tree. The gardener objected that the tree was slow growing and would not reach maturity for 100 years. The Marshall replied, 'In that case, there is no time to lose; plant it this afternoon!' ~ John F. Kennedy (1917 - 1963)
You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, 'I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.' You must do the thing you think you cannot do.
~ Eleanor Roosevelt (1884 - 1962)
Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe. ~ H. G. Wells (1866 - 1946)
Seek ye first the good things of the mind, and the rest will either be supplied or its loss will not be felt. ~ Sir Francis Bacon (1561 - 1626)
See, that's all you're thinking about, is winning. You're confirming your sense of self- worth through outward reward instead of through inner appreciation. ~ Barbara Hall
Regimen is superior to medicine. ~ Voltaire (1694 - 1778)
What we have to do is to be forever curiously testing new opinions and courting new impressions. ~ Walter Pater (1839 - 1894)
Battle not with monsters, lest ye become a monster, and if you gaze into the abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.
~ Friedrich Nietzsche (1844 - 1900)
Ability is nothing without opportunity. ~ Napoleon I
Power always has to be kept in check; power exercised in secret, especially under the cloak of national security, is doubly dangerous. ~ William Proxmire
I have found a desire within myself that no experience in this world can satisfy; the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world. ~ C. S. Lewis (1898 - 1963)
Our generation is realistic, for we have come to know man as he really is. After all, man is that being who invented the gas chambers of Auschwitz; however, he is also that being who entered those gas chambers upright, with the Lord's Prayer or the Shema Yisrael on his lips. ~ Viktor Frankl,
Women's liberation will not be achieved until a woman can become paunchy and bald and still think that she's attractive to the opposite sex. ~ Earl Wilson
I dream of wayward gulls and all landless lovers, rare moments of winter sun, peace, privacy, for everyone. ~ William F. Claire
Age is no guarantee of maturity. ~ Lawana Blackwell
Keep your broken arm inside your sleeve. ~ Chinese Proverb
There is occasions and causes why and wherefore in all things. ~ William Shakespeare (1564 - 1616), "King Henry V", Act 5 scene 1
Beware the flatterer: he feeds you with an empty spoon. ~ Cosino DeGregrio
The great use of life is to spend it for something that will outlast it. ~ William James (1842 - 1910)
THIS is why democracy doesn't work! Too much talking leads to not enough violence! ~ Maritza Campos, College Roomies From Hell!!! Webcomic
All exact science is dominated by the idea of approximation. ~ Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
Dealing with network executives is like being nibbled to death by ducks. ~ Eric Sevareid
Have the courage to be ignorant of a great number of things, in order to avoid the calamity of being ignorant of everything. ~ Sydney Smith (1771 - 1845)
If you haven't found something strange during the day, it hasn't been much of a day. ~ John A. Wheeler
Good taste is the worst vice ever invented. ~ Edith Sitwell (1887 - 1964)
Sometimes people are layered like that. There's something totally different underneath than what's on the surface. But sometimes, there's a third, even deeper level, and that one is the same as the top surface one. Like with pie. ~ Joss Whedon, Zack Whedon, Maurissa Tancharoen, and Jed Whedon (Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog, 2008)
It is of interest to note that while some dolphins are reported to have learned English -- up to fifty words used in correct context -- no human being has been reported to have learned dolphinese. ~ Carl Sagan (1934 - 1996)
I had an epiphany a few years ago where I was out at a celebrity party and it suddenly dawned on me that I had yet to meet a celebrity who is as smart and interesting as any of my friends. ~ Moby, quoted on CNN.com, March 2005
Writing gives you the illusion of control, and then you realize it's just an illusion, that people are going to bring their own stuff into it. ~ David Sedaris, interview in Louisville Courier-Journal, June 5, 2005
I hope that when I die, people say about me, 'Boy, that guy sure owed me a lot of money.' ~ Jack Handey (1949 - )
Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory. ~ Albert Schweitzer (1875 - 1965)
Since we cannot know all that there is to be known about anything, we ought to know a little about everything. ~ Blaise Pascal (1623 - 1662)
The worst sin toward our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them: that's the essence of inhumanity. ~ George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950)
Most of the change we think we see in life is due to truths being in and out of favor. ~ Robert Frost (1874 - 1963)
....it is better to succeed with success than failure. ~ George W. Bush Jan. 21, 2001, Inauguration speech
When you wish to instruct, be brief; that men's minds take in quickly what you say, learn its lesson, and retain it faithfully. Every word that is unnecessary only pours over the side of a brimming mind. ~ Cicero (106 BC - 43 BC)
The only time you ever run out of chances is when you stop taking them. ~ Patty Labelle
Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony. ~ Mahatma Gandhi (1869 - 1948)
People can have the Model T in any colour--so long as it's black. ~ Henry Ford (1863 - 1947)
Life... is like a grapefruit. It's orange and squishy, and has a few pips in it, and some folks have half a one for breakfast. ~ Douglas Adams (1952 - 2001)
In mathematics you don't understand things. You just get used to them. ~ Johann von Neumann (1903 - 1957)
In every work of genius we recognize our own rejected thoughts; they come back to us with a certain alienated majesty. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 - 1882)
You walk into this room at your own risk, because it leads to the future; not a future that will be, but one that might be. This is not a new world: It is simply an extension of what began in the old one. It has patterned itself after every dictator who has ever planted the ripping imprint of a boot on the pages of history since the beginning of time. It has refinements, technological advancements, and a more sophisticated approach to the destruction of human freedom. But like every one of the super states that preceded it, it has one iron rule: Logic is an enemy, and truth is a menace. This is Mr. Romney Wordsworth, in his last forty-eight hours on Earth. He's a citizen of the State, but will soon have to be eliminated, because he's built out of flesh and because he has a mind. Mr. Romney Wordsworth, who will draw his last breaths in the Twilight Zone. ~ The Twilight Zone, The Obsolete Man
Man has to suffer. When he has no real afflictions, he invents some. ~ Jose Marti
He who builds a better mousetrap these days runs into material shortages, patent-infringement suits, work stoppages, collusive bidding, discount discrimination--and taxes." ~ H. E. Martz
God runs electromagnetics by wave theory on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, and the Devil runs them by quantum theory on Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday. ~ Sir William Bragg (1862 - 1942)
Freedom of the press is limited to those who own one. ~ A. J. Liebling (1904 - 1963)
It's not true that life is one damn thing after another; it is one damn thing over and over. ~ Edna St. Vincent Millay (1892 - 1950)
I have given two cousins to war and I stand ready to sacrifice my wife's brother. ~ Artemus Ward (1834 - 1867)
The human mind treats a new idea the same way the body treats a strange protein; it rejects it. ~ P. B. Medawar (1915 - )
Laughter is the closest distance between two people. ~ Victor Borge (1909 - 2000)
The whole life of man is but a point of time; let us enjoy it. ~ Plutarch (46 AD - 120 AD)
The bravest thing you can do when you are not brave is to profess courage and act accordingly. ~ Corra Harris
What is the difference between unethical and ethical advertising? Unethical advertising uses falsehoods to deceive the public; ethical advertising uses truth to deceive the public. ~ Vilhjalmur Stefansson (1879 - 1962)
Any fool can tell the truth, but it requires a man of some sense to know how to lie well. ~ Samuel Butler (1835 - 1902)
A good man would prefer to be defeated than to defeat injustice by evil means. ~ Sallust (86 BC - 34 BC), 'Jugurthine War,' 41 B.C.
Never eat more than you can lift. ~ Miss Piggy
Harbor Master
07-14-2009, 07:05 AM
What else is love but understanding and rejoicing in the fact that another person lives, acts, and experiences otherwise than we do…? ~ Friedrich Nietzsche (1844 - 1900)
I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them. ~ Isaac Asimov (1920 - 1992)
Technology is dominated by two types of people: those who understand what they do not manage, and those who manage what they do not understand. ~ Putt's Law
Confusion is always the most honest response. ~ Marty Indik
Harbor Master
07-14-2009, 07:11 AM
Every artist dips his brush in his own soul, and paints his own nature into his pictures.
~ Henry Ward Beecher (1813 - 1887), Proverbs from Plymouth Pulpit, 1887
Enjoy every sandwich. ~ Warren Zevon, From final interview on Letterman prior to Warren's death in Sept. 2003
Do what you can, with what you have, where you are. ~ Theodore Roosevelt (1858 - 1919)
I'd rather have 30 minutes of wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special. ~ Julia Roberts, Steel Magnolias
Men should not trust in God as if God did all, and yet labor earnestly as is he himself did all.
~ Allan K. Chalmers
In time we hate that which we often fear. ~ William Shakespeare (1564 - 1616)
Nobody can be exactly like me. Sometimes even I have trouble doing it. ~ Tallulah Bankhead (1903 - 1968)
In science the credit goes to the man who convinces the world, not the man to whom the idea first occurs. ~ Sir Francis Darwin (1848 - 1925), Eugenics Review, April 1914
After being Turned Down by numerous Publishers, he had decided to write for Posterity.
~ George Ade (1866 - 1944), "Fables in Slang", 1899
God always has an angel of help for those who are willing to do their duty. ~ T. L. Cuyler
Rock and roll is the hamburger that ate the world. ~ Peter York
All progress is based upon a universal innate desire on the part of every organism to live beyond its income. ~ Samuel Butler (1835 - 1902), Notebooks, 1912
Try to learn something about everything and everything about something. ~ Thomas H. Huxley (1825 - 1895)
Talking with you is sort of the conversational equivalent of an out of body experience. ~ Bill Watterson (1958 - ), Calvin & Hobbes
Every hero becomes a bore at last. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 - 1882)
Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip. ~ Will Rogers (1879 - 1935)
A neurosis is a secret that you don't know you are keeping. ~ Kenneth Tynan
I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve. ~ J. R. R. Tolkien (1892 - 1973)
People who say you're just as old as you feel are all wrong, fortunately. ~ Russell Baker (1925 - )
Every improvement in communication makes the bore more terrible. ~ Frank Moore Colby
It is only an auctioneer who can equally and impartially admire all schools of art. ~ Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900)
Happiness is not achieved by the conscious pursuit of happiness; it is generally the by-product of other activities. ~ Aldous Huxley (1894 - 1963)
As an adolescent I aspired to lasting fame, I craved factual certainty, and I thirsted for a meaningful vision of human life - so I became a scientist. This is like becoming an archbishop so you can meet girls. ~ M. Cartmill
People who like this sort of thing will find this the sort of thing they like. ~ Abraham Lincoln (1809 - 1865)
Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance. ~ Sam Brown, Washington Post, 1977
Charm is the quality in others that makes us more satisfied with ourselves. ~ Henri-Frédéric Amiel
There are two types of people--those who come into a room and say, 'Well, here I am!' and those who come in and say, 'Ah, there you are.' ~ Frederick L Collins
I not only use all the brains that I have, but all that I can borrow. ~ Woodrow Wilson (1856 - 1924)
There are three rules for writing the novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are. ~ W. Somerset Maugham (1874 - 1965)
I like an escalator because an escalator can never break, it can only become stairs. There would never be an escalator temporarily out of order sign, only an escalator temporarily stairs. Sorry for the convenience. ~ Mitch Hedberg (1968 - 2005)
Technology adds nothing to art. Two thousand years ago, I could tell you a story, and at any point during the story I could stop, and ask, Now do you want the hero to be kidnapped, or not? But that would, of course, have ruined the story. Part of the experience of being entertained is sitting back and plugging into someone else's vision. ~ Penn Jillette (1955 - )
Our envy of others devours us most of all. ~ Alexander Solzhenitsyn (1918 - )
Artists who seek perfection in everything are those who cannot attain it in anything. ~ Eugene Delacroix (1798 - 1863)
Abnormal is so common, it's practically normal. ~ Cory Doctorow, Little Brother, 2008
Art enables us to find ourselves and lose ourselves at the same time. ~ Thomas Merton (1915 - 1968)
People often say that 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder,' and I say that the most liberating thing about beauty is realizing that you are the beholder. This empowers us to find beauty in places where others have not dared to look, including inside ourselves. ~ Salma Hayek
What can you say about a society that says that God is dead and Elvis is alive? ~ Irv Kupcinet
What's another word for Thesaurus? ~ Steven Wright (1955 - )
I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart. ~ e e cummings (1894 - 1962)
An intellectual snob is someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture and not think of The Lone Ranger. ~ Dan Rather (1931 - )
I often quote myself. It adds spice to my conversation. ~ George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950)
Every man is wise when attacked by a mad dog; fewer when pursued by a mad woman; only the wisest survive when attacked by a mad notion. ~ Robertson Davies
Machines take me by surprise with great frequency. ~ Alan Turing (1912 - 1954)
When a person can no longer laugh at himself, it is time for others to laugh at him. ~ Thomas Szasz
There are many who dare not kill themselves for fear of what the neighbors will say. ~ Cyril Connolly (1903 - 1974)
Speak when you are angry--and you will make the best speech you'll ever regret. ~ Laurence J. Peter (1919 - 1988)
First there is a time when we believe everything, then for a little while we believe with discrimination, then we believe nothing whatever, and then we believe everything again - and, moreover, give reasons why we believe. ~ Georg Christoph Lichtenberg (1742 - 1799)
Man is equally incapable of seeing the nothingness from which he emerges and the infinity in which he is engulfed. ~ Blaise Pascal (1623 - 1662)
Football is a mistake. It combines the two worst elements of American life. Violence and committee meetings. ~ George F. Will (1941 - )
Egotism is the anesthetic that dulls the pain of stupidity. ~ Frank Leahy
A magician pulls rabbits out of hats. An experimental psychologist pulls habits out of rats. ~ Anonymous
It is the wretchedness of being rich that you have to live with rich people. ~ Logan Pearsall Smith (1865 - 1946)
But when a young lady is to be a heroine, the perverseness of forty surrounding families cannot prevent her. Something must and will happen to throw a hero in her way. ~ Jane Austen (1775 - 1817)
Time has a wonderful way of showing us what really matters. ~ Margaret Peters
If indeed you must be candid, be candid beautifully. ~ Kahlil Gibran (1883 - 1931)
The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep. ~ Woody Allen (1935 - )
Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe. ~ Jackie Mason (1934 - )
To get the best out of a man go to what is best in him. ~ Daniel Considine
I wanted you to see what real courage is, instead of getting the idea that courage is a man with a gun in his hand. It's when you know you're licked before you begin but you begin anyway and you see it through no matter what. ~ Harper Lee (1926 - )
He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife. ~ Douglas Adams (1952 - 2001)
I have noticed that the people who are late are often so much jollier than the people who have to wait for them. ~ E. V. Lucas
We hate some persons because we do not know them; and we will not know them because we hate them. ~ Charles Caleb Colton (1780 - 1832)
Education is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper or your self-confidence. ~ Robert Frost (1874 - 1963)
I don't know how to have casual conversation. You think you're talking about one thing, and either you are and it's incredibly boring, or you're not because it's subtext and you need a decoder ring. ~ Sara B. Cooper, House M.D., Love Hurts, 2004
If we attend continually and promptly to the little that we can do, we shall ere long be surprised to find how little remains that we cannot do. ~ Samuel Butler (1835 - 1902)
I'm tired of all this nonsense about beauty being only skin-deep. That's deep enough. What do you want, an adorable pancreas? ~ Jean Kerr
You try to give away what you want yourself. ~ Lois McMaster Bujold, "Memory", 1996
Everything in the world may be endured except continued prosperity. ~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749 - 1832)
I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago. ~ Will Rogers (1879 - 1935)
It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers. ~ James Thurber (1894 - 1961)
Most conversations are simply monologues delivered in the presence of witnesses. ~ Margaret Millar
It is difficult to get a man to understand something when his job depends on not understanding it. ~ Upton Sinclair (1878 - 1968)
I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying. ~ Woody Allen (1935 - )
I do not take a single newspaper, nor read one a month, and I feel myself infinitely the happier for it. ~ Thomas Jefferson (1743 - 1826)
Man is the only animal that laughs and weeps, for he is the only animal that is struck with the difference between what things are and what they ought to be. ~ William Hazlitt (1778 - 1830)
A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. ~ George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950)
Indecision may or may not be my problem. ~ Jimmy Buffett
To the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure. ~ J. K. Rowling
Happiness depends upon ourselves. ~ Aristotle (384 BC - 322 BC)
Anger as soon as fed is dead-
'Tis starving makes it fat.
~ Emily Dickinson (1830 - 1886), Poems, Second Series, 1891
The more original a discovery, the more obvious it seems afterwards. ~ Arthur Koestler (1905 - 1983)
keystonelight
08-02-2009, 10:11 PM
Alexander Hamilton started the U.S. Treasury with nothing, and that was the closest our country has ever been to being even.
Will Rogers
Nice guys finish last, but we get to sleep in. ~ Evan Davis
Everything you can imagine is real. ~ Pablo Picasso (1881 - 1973)
A bore is a man who deprives you of solitude without providing you with company. ~ Gian Vincenzo Gravina (1664 - 1718)
People are, if anything, more touchy about being thought silly than they are about being thought unjust. ~ E. B. White (1899 - 1985)
And that's the world in a nutshell, an appropriate receptacle. ~ Stan Dunn
Given a choice between two theories, take the one which is funnier. ~ Blore's Razor
Home computers are being called upon to perform many new functions, including the consumption of homework formerly eaten by the dog. ~ Doug Larson
Any clod can have the facts, but having opinions is an art. ~ Charles McCabe, San Francisco Chronicle
ran into a few more I got to post...
It is with our passions, as it is with fire and water, they are good servants but bad masters. ~ Aesop (620 BC - 560 BC)
The happiness of a man in this life does not consist in the absence but in the mastery of his passions. ~ Alfred Lord Tennyson (1809 - 1892)
Any piece of clothing can be sexy with a quietly passionate woman inside it. ~ Anonymous, O Magazine
Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place. ~ Billy Crystal (1947 - )
I'm too shy to express my sexual needs except over the phone to people I don't know. ~ Garry Shandling (1949 - )
I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty. ~ George Burns (1896 - 1996)
A man can sleep around, no questions asked, but if a woman makes nineteen or twenty mistakes she's a tramp. ~ Joan Rivers (1935 - )
In America sex is an obsession, in other parts of the world it is a fact. ~ Marlene Dietrich (1901 - 1992)
Does it really matter what these affectionate people do-- so long as they don’t do it in the streets and frighten the horses! ~ Mrs. Patrick Campbell
Life is a sexually transmitted disease. ~ R. D. Laing
Desperate is not a sexual preference. ~ Randy K. Milholland
I know love and lust don't always keep the same company. ~ Stephenie Meyer
But seduction isn’t making someone do what they don’t want to do. Seduction is enticing someone into doing what they secretly want to do already. ~ Waiter Rant
I know nothing about sex because I was always married. ~ Zsa Zsa Gabor (1919 - )
Though I am not naturally honest, I am so sometimes by chance. ~ William Shakespeare (1564 - 1616)
Illusion is the first of all pleasures. ~ Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900)
No one means all he says, and yet very few say all they mean, for words are slippery and thought is viscous. ~ Henry Adams (1838 - 1918)
The first question I ask myself when something doesn't seem to be beautiful is why do I think it's not beautiful. And very shortly you discover that there is no reason. ~ John Cage (1912 - 1992)
Corona
08-09-2009, 10:29 PM
If you do what you have always done, you will get what you have always gotten.
Cant remember who said it but I like it. :happy:
Dorella Allerod
08-09-2009, 10:32 PM
LOL! That sounds about right. And true. :biggrin:
A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin. ~ H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956)
Many would be cowards if they had courage enough. ~ Thomas Fuller (1608 - 1661)
I don't like composers who think. It gets in the way of their plagiarism. ~ Howard Dietz
Everybody hates me because I'm so universally liked. ~ Peter de Vries
If you do what you have always done, you will get what you have always gotten.
Cant remember who said it but I like it. :happy:
“If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten.” ~ Anthony Robbins
http://thinkexist.com/quotation/if_you_ ... 22354.html (http://thinkexist.com/quotation/if_you_do_what_you-ve_always_done-you-ll_get_what/222354.html)
Google was my friend :mrgreen:
I got kicked out of ballet class because I pulled a groin muscle. It wasn't mine. ~ Rita Rudner
Treat all disasters as if they were trivialities but never treat a triviality as if it were a disaster. ~ Quentin Crisp
Every generation laughs at the old fashions, but follows religiously the new. ~ Henry David Thoreau (1817 - 1862), "Walden", 1854
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye. ~ Miss Piggy
Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome. ~ Isaac Asimov (1920 - 1992)
What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death. ~ Dave Barry (1947 - )
A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in students. ~ John Ciardi (1916 - 1986)
You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there. ~ George Burns (1896 - 1996)
I don't give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way. ~ Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
A life of pleasure makes even the strongest mind frivolous at last. ~ Edward Bulwer-Lytton (1803 - 1873)
It is good to be without vices, but it is not good to be without temptations. ~ Walter Bagehot (1826 - 1877)
No one has ever had an idea in a dress suit. ~ Sir Frederick G. Banting (1891 - 1941)
I have opinions of my own -- strong opinions -- but I don't always agree with them. ~ George Bush (1924 - )
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~ Truman Capote (1924 - 1984)
We think in generalities, but we live in detail. ~ Alfred North Whitehead (1861 - 1947)
Management is doing things right; leadership is doing the right things. ~ Peter Drucker (1909 - 2005)
Nobody believes the official spokesman... but everybody trusts an unidentified source. ~ Ron Nesen
I hate women because they always know where things are. ~ James Thurber (1894 - 1961)
Why is this thus? What is the reason for this thusness? ~ Artemus Ward (1834 - 1867)
By a curious confusion, many modern critics have passed from the proposition that a masterpiece may be unpopular to the other proposition that unless it is unpopular it cannot be a masterpiece. ~ G. K. Chesterton (1874 - 1936)
Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia. ~ Charles M. Schulz (1922 - 2000)
If one sticks too rigidly to one's principles, one would hardly see anybody. ~ Agatha Christie (1890 - 1976)
Not a shred of evidence exists in favor of the idea that life is serious. ~ Brendan Gill
An opinion should be the result of thought, not a substitute for it. ~ Jef Mallett
An author is a fool who, not content with boring those he lives with, insists on boring future generations. ~ Charles de Montesquieu (1689 - 1755)
A person is never happy except at the price of some ignorance. ~ Anatole France (1844 - 1924)
The smaller the mind the greater the conceit. ~ Aesop (620 BC - 560 BC)
The good life, as I conceive it, is a happy life. I do not mean that if you are good you will be happy - I mean that if you are happy you will be good. ~ Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
But what is the difference between literature and journalism?
...Journalism is unreadable and literature is not read. That is all.
~ Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900), The Critic as Artist, 1891
Sometimes people carry to such perfection the mask they have assumed that in due course they actually become the person they seem. ~ W. Somerset Maugham (1874 - 1965)
How do you tell a communist? Well, it's someone who reads Marx and Lenin. And how do you tell an anti-Communist? It's someone who understands Marx and Lenin. ~ Ronald Reagan (1911 - 2004)
There is a tragic flaw in our precious Constitution, and I don't know what can be done to fix it. This is it: Only nut cases want to be president. ~ Kurt Vonnegut (1922 - 2007)
There is no nonsense so gross that society will not, at some time, make a doctrine of it and defend it with every weapon of communal stupidity. ~ Robertson Davies
When I took office, only high energy physicists had ever heard of what is called the Worldwide Web.... Now even my cat has its own page. ~ Bill Clinton (1946 - )
Man is ready to die for an idea, provided that idea is not quite clear to him. ~ Paul Eldridge
I used to think that the brain was the most wonderful organ in my body. Then I realized who was telling me this. ~ Emo Phillips
Spare no expense to save money on this one. ~ Samuel Goldwyn (1882 - 1974)
When a thing is funny, search it carefully for a hidden truth. ~ George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950)
With or without religion, you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion. ~ Steven Weinberg (1933 - )
There are two ways to pass a hurdle: leaping over or plowing through... There needs to be a monster truck option. ~ Jeph Jacques
Thank God men cannot as yet fly and lay waste the sky as well as the earth! ~ Henry David Thoreau (1817 - 1862)
The Romans would never have found time to conquer the world if they had been obliged first to learn Latin. ~ Heinrich Heine (1797 - 1856)
He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death. ~ Saki (1870 - 1916)
Wisdom is what's left after we've run out of personal opinions. ~ Cullen Hightower
I respect faith, but doubt is what gets you an education. ~ Wilson Mizner (1876 - 1933)
Examinations are formidable even to the best prepared, for the greatest fool may ask more than the wisest man can answer. ~ Charles Caleb Colton (1780 - 1832)
Politics is made up largely of irrelevancies. ~ Dalton Camp
Joel: That's the movies, Ed. Try reality.
Ed: No thanks.
~ Ellen Herman, Northern Exposure, Only You, 1991
California is a fine place to live--if you happen to be an orange. ~ Fred Allen (1894 - 1956)
I tended to place my wife under a pedestal. ~ Woody Allen (1935 - )
Wit makes its own welcome, and levels all distinctions. No dignity, no learning, no force of character, can make any stand against good wit. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 - 1882)
Doing nothing is very hard to do ... you never know when you're finished. ~ Leslie Nielsen (1926 - )
jopem
08-25-2009, 06:58 PM
"You are a pathetic weak creature ambling toward the cannoned mouth of ignorance who's highest aspiration is maybe to one day consume some animal shaped crackers." - The Ninja from Ask A Ninja
The average, healthy, well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just plain terrible. ~ Jean Kerr
We are born charming, fresh and spontaneous and must be civilized before we are fit to participate in society. ~ Judith Martin, (Miss Manners)
If living conditions don't stop improving in this country, we're going to run out of humble beginnings for our great men. ~ Russell P. Askue
I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out. ~ Rodney Dangerfield (1921 - 2004)
jopem
08-26-2009, 09:44 PM
"Hey, hey, hey...don't be mean. We don't wanna be mean. Because wherever you go, there you are."-Buckaroo Banzai
Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone? ~ James Thurber (1894 - 1961)[/B], New Yorker cartoon caption, June 5, 1937
For most men life is a search for the proper manila envelope in which to get themselves filed. ~ Clifton Fadiman (1904 - 1999)
Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. ~ Fran Lebowitz[/URL] (1950 - )
No matter what side of the argument you are on, you always find people on your side that you wish were on the other. ~ Jascha Heifetz (1901 - 1987)
Kaziarl
08-27-2009, 04:43 PM
When great men speak, it's because they have something to say.
When great fools speak, it's because they have to say something.
Failure is not falling down.
failure is not getting back up
~Don't know... cant remember who said them.
But the fact that some geniuses were laughed at does not imply that all who are laughed at are geniuses. They laughed at Columbus, they laughed at Fulton, they laughed at the Wright brothers. But they also laughed at Bozo the Clown. ~ Carl Sagan (1934 - 1996)
The secret of eternal youth is arrested development. ~ Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884 - 1980)
If fifty million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing. ~ Anatole France (1844 - 1924)
When two men in business always agree, one of them is unnecessary. ~ William Wrigley Jr. (1861 - 1932)
By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. ~ Socrates (469 BC - 399 BC)
Those who flee temptation generally leave a forwarding address. ~ Lane Olinghouse
Thought is only a flash between two long nights, but this flash is everything. ~ Henri Poincare (1854 - 1912)
There are no whole truths; all truths are half- truths. It is trying to treat them as whole truths that plays the devil. ~ Alfred North Whitehead (1861 - 1947)
Is sloppiness in speech caused by ignorance or apathy? I don't know and I don't care. ~ William Safire (1929 - )
The more I study religions the more I am convinced that man never worshipped anything but himself. ~ Sir Richard Francis Burton (1821 - 1890)
I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals. I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants. ~ A. Whitney Brown
I look to the future because that's where I'm going to spend the rest of my life. ~ George Burns (1896 - 1996)
Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.
Macbeth, scene v
No. ~ Amy Carter, (President Jimmy Carter's daughter) when asked by a reporter if she had any message for the children of America
If I have seen further it is by standing on the shoulders of giants. ~ Isaac Newton (1642 - 1727), Letter to Robert Hooke, February 5, 1675
People seem to enjoy things more when they know a lot of other people have been left out of the pleasure. ~ Russell Baker (1925 - )
When you're through changing, you're through. ~ Bruce Barton
Truth is more of a stranger than fiction. ~ Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
Why do writers write? Because it isn't there. ~ Thomas Berger
If I knew I was going to live this long, I'd have taken better care of myself. ~ Mickey Mantle (1931 - 1995), (attributed)
Never face facts; if you do, you'll never get up in the morning. ~ Marlo Thomas
The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. ~ Dudley Moore (1935 - 2002
The only difference between the Democrats and the Republicans is that the Democrats allow the poor to be corrupt, too. ~ Oscar Levant (1906 - 1972)
The trouble with being poor is that it takes up all of your time. ~ Willem de Kooning (1904 - )
The thing I hate about an argument is that it always interrupts a discussion. ~ G. K. Chesterton (1874 - 1936)
Corona
09-03-2009, 09:17 AM
"There is the type who always believes that after being entirely free from alcohol for a period of time he can take a drink without danger."
"There is the type who always believes that after being entirely free from alcohol for a period of time he can take a drink without danger."~ The Doctors Opinion - xxx (http://fellowship12.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=63%3Adoctorsopinion&catid=39%3Achapters&Itemid=65&limitstart=5) Written by William Duncan Silkworth M.D.
To be positive: To be mistaken at the top of one's voice. ~ Ambrose Bierce (1842 - 1914)
The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents. ~ H. P. Lovecraft (1890 - 1937), "The Call of Cthulhu", first line
There is no such thing as an underestimate of average intelligence. ~ Henry Adams (1838 - 1918 )
Think twice before you speak, and then you may be able to say something more insulting than if you spoke right out at once. ~ Evan Esar (1899 - 1995)
History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives. ~ Abba Eban (1915 - 2002)
The problem with any unwritten law is that you don't know where to go to erase it. ~ Glaser and Way
I hate the outdoors. To me the outdoors is where the car is. ~ Will Durst
The greatest challenge to any thinker is stating the problem in a way that will allow a solution. ~ Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
All animals are equal but some animals are more equal than others. ~ George Orwell (1903 - 1950), "Animal Farm"
Martyrdom... is the only way in which a man can become famous without ability. ~ George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950)
It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating. ~ Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900)
I'm a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it. ~ Thomas Jefferson (1743 - 1826), (attributed)
The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten counting system and likes round numbers. ~ Scott Adams (1957 - )
A fine quotation is a diamond on the finger of a man of wit, and a pebble in the hand of a fool. ~ Joseph Roux
Whoso would be a man must be a nonconformist. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 - 1882)
Those who can laugh without cause have either found the true meaning of happiness or have gone stark raving mad.Norm Papernick
I'm not concerned about all hell breaking loose, but that a PART of hell will break loose... it'll be much harder to detect. ~ George Carlin (1937 - 2008 )
It is a curious thing... that every creed promises a paradise which will be absolutely uninhabitable for anyone of civilized taste. ~ Evelyn Waugh (1903 - 1966)
Too many have dispensed with generosity in order to practice charity. ~ Albert Camus (1913 - 1960)
We're actors - we're the opposite of people. ~ Tom Stoppard (1937 - ), Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead (1967)
Not only is there no God, but try getting a plumber on weekends. ~ Woody Allen (1935 - )
I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody. ~ Bill Cosby (1937 - )
I have such poor vision I can date anybody. ~ Garry Shandling (1949 - )
I can't bring myself to say, 'Well, I guess I'll be toddling along.' It isn't that I can't toddle. It's just that I can't guess I'll toddle. ~ Robert Benchley (1889 - 1945)
I feel like a fugitive from the law of averages. ~ William H. Mauldin (1921 - 2003)
If at first you don't succeed, find out if the loser gets anything. ~ Bill Lyon
Humor is just another defense against the universe. ~ Mel Brooks (1926 - )
The skill of writing is to create a context in which other people can think. ~ Edwin Schlossberg
A cynic is not merely one who reads bitter lessons from the past, he is one who is prematurely disappointed in the future. ~ Sidney J. Harris
There is no monument dedicated to the memory of a committee. ~ Lester J. Pourciau
I keep the subject of my inquiry constantly before me, and wait till the first dawning opens gradually, by little and little, into a full and clear light. ~ Isaac Newton (1642 - 1727)
It is only by following your deepest instinct that you can lead a rich life, and if you let your fear of consequence prevent you from following your deepest instinct, then your life will be safe, expedient and thin. ~ Katharine Butler Hathaway
He who hesitates is a damned fool. ~ Mae West (1892 - 1980)
Interestingly, according to modern astronomers, space is finite. This is a very comforting thought-- particularly for people who can never remember where they have left things. ~ Woody Allen (1935 - )
He's the kind of a guy who lights up a room just by flicking a switch. ~ Unknown
It is fun to be in the same decade with you. ~ Franklin D. Roosevelt (1882 - 1945), in a letter to Winston Churchill
Men are like steel. When they lose their temper, they lose their worth. ~ Chuck Norris (1940 - )
I was always taught to respect my elders and I've now reached the age when I don't have anybody to respect. ~ George Burns (1896 - 1996)
From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it. ~ Groucho Marx (1890 - 1977)
We are here on Earth to do good to others. What the others are here for, I don't know. ~ W. H. Auden (1907 - 1973)
A timid person is frightened before a danger, a coward during the time, and a courageous person afterward. ~ Jean Paul Richter (1763 - 1825)
Perpetual devotion to what a man calls his business, is only to be sustained by perpetual neglect of many other things. ~ Robert Louis Stevenson (1850 - 1894)
Just the omission of Jane Austen's books alone would make a fairly good library out of a library that hadn't a book in it. ~ Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office. ~ Robert Frost (1874 - 1963)
No human thing is of serious importance. ~ Plato (427 BC - 347 BC)
The more I want to get something done, the less I call it work. ~ Richard Bach
If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one? ~ Abraham Lincoln (1809 - 1865)
Leave it to a girl to take the fun out of sex discrimination. ~ Bill Watterson (1958 - ), Calvin in "Calvin and Hobbes"
No man's life, liberty or property are safe while the legislature is in session. ~ Judge Gideon J. Tucker
The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all. ~ H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956)
I am more and more convinced that our happiness or unhappiness depends more on the way we meet the events of life than on the nature of those events themselves. ~ Alexander Humboldt (1769 - 1859)
Choose the life that is most useful, and habit will make it the most agreeable. ~ Sir Francis Bacon (1561 - 1626)
Man's mind, once stretched by a new idea, never regains its original dimensions. ~ Oliver Wendell Holmes (1809 - 1894)
[The television is] an invention that permits you to be entertained in your living room by people you wouldn't have in your home. ~ David Frost
There are only two ways of telling the complete truth--anonymously and posthumously. ~ Thomas Sowell (1930 - )
Sure there are dishonest men in local government. But there are dishonest men in national government too. ~ Richard M. Nixon (1913 - 1994)
In great affairs men show themselves as they wish to be seen; in small things they show themselves as they are. ~ Nicholas Chamfort (1741 - 1794)
I know who I am. No one else knows who I am. If I was a giraffe, and someone said I was a snake, I'd think, no, actually I'm a giraffe. ~ Richard Gere
Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place. ~ Billy Crystal (1947 - )
New York now leads the world's great cities in the number of people around whom you shouldn't make a sudden move. ~ David Letterman (1947 - )
Why is it that our memory is good enough to retain the least triviality that happens to us, and yet not good enough to recollect how often we have told it to the same person? ~ Francois de La Rochefoucauld (1613 - 1680)
Television is more interesting than people. If it were not, we would have people standing in the corners of our rooms. ~ Alan Corenk
It's a lot like nature. You only have as many animals as the ecosystem can support and you only have as many friends as you can tolerate the B****ing of. ~ Randy K. Milholland
There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened. ~ Douglas Adams (1952 - 2001)
1. Never tell everything at once. ~ Ken Venturi, Ken Venturi's Two Great Rules of Life
It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid. ~ George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950)
Her virtue was that she said what she thought, her vice that what she thought didn't amount to much. ~ Peter Ustinov (1921 - 2004)
Freedom is just Chaos, with better lighting. ~ Alan Dean Foster
Money can't buy friends, but it can get you a better class of enemy. ~ Spike Milligan
America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room. Every time it wags its tail, it knocks over a chair. ~ Arnold Toynbee (1889 - 1975)
A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who, however, has never learned to walk forward. ~ Franklin D. Roosevelt (1882 - 1945)
Part of being sane, is being a little bit crazy. ~ Janet Long
The two most common elements in the universe are Hydrogen and stupidity. ~ Harlan Ellison (1934 - )
If the English language made any sense, a catastrophe would be an apostrophe with fur. ~ Doug Larson
Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body. ~ Sir Richard Steele
“Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats” ~ Henry Louis Mencken
“A man loses his sense of direction after four drinks; a woman loses hers after four kisses ~ Henry Louis Mencken
“Love is like war; easy to begin but very hard to stop ~ Henry Louis Mencken
“The theory seems to be that as long as a man is a failure he is one of God's children, but that as soon as he succeeds he is taken over by the Devil. ~ Henry Louis Mencken
“The plain truth is that I am not a fair man, and don't want to hear both sides ~ Henry Louis Mencken
“The aim of public education is not to spread enlightenment at all; it is simply to reduce as many individuals as possible to the same safe level, to breed a standard citizenry, to put down dissent and originality ~ Henry Louis Mencken
“We must respect the other fellow's religion,but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart. ~ Henry Louis Mencken
There was a time when we expected nothing of our children but obedience, as opposed to the present, when we expect everything of them but obedience. ~ Anatole Broyard
Life being what it is, one dreams of revenge. ~ Paul Gauguin (1848 - 1903)
There are two ways to slide easily through life; to believe everything or to doubt everything. Both ways save us from thinking. ~ Alfred Korzybski (1879 - 1950)
No tyranny is so irksome as petty tyranny: the officious demands of policemen, government clerks, and electromechanical gadgets. ~ Edward Abbey (1927 - 1989)
A little more moderation would be good. Of course, my life hasn't exactly been one of moderation. ~ Donald Trump (1946 - )
You cannot make a man by standing a sheep on its hind legs. But by standing a flock of sheep in that position you can make a crowd of men. ~ Max Beerbohm (1872 - 1956)
Nothing can be so amusingly arrogant as a young man who has just discovered an old idea and thinks it is his own. ~ Sidney J. Harris
There is no greater importance in all the world like knowing you are right and that the wave of the world is wrong, yet the wave crashes upon you. ~ Norman Mailer (1923 - 2007)
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city. ~ George Burns (1896 - 1996)
When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to criticize or attack the government of my own country. I make up for lost time when I come home. ~ Sir Winston Churchill (1874 - 1965)
After two years in Washington, I often long for the realism and sincerity of Hollywood. ~ Fred Thompson
It is a profitable thing, if one is wise, to seem foolish. ~ Aeschylus (525 BC - 456 BC)
Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform. ~ Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
Hollywood is a place where they'll pay you a thousand dollars for a kiss and fifty cents for your soul. ~ Marilyn Monroe (1926 - 1962)
A waist is a terrible thing to mind. ~ Jane Caminos
Entropy is the normal state of consciousness - a condition that is neither useful nor enjoyable. ~ Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi
Any transition serious enough to alter your definition of self will require not just small adjustments in your way of living and thinking but a full-on metamorphosis. ~ Martha Beck, O Magazine, Growing Wings, January 2004
I don't mind what Congress does, as long as they don't do it in the streets and frighten the horses. ~ Victor Hugo (1802 - 1885)
The best way to predict the future is to invent it. ~ Alan Kay
If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door. ~ Paul Beatty
Coming home from very lonely places, all of us go a little mad: whether from great personal success, or just an all-night drive, we are the sole survivors of a world no one else has ever seen. ~ John le Carre (1931 - )
Let's have some new cliches. ~ Samuel Goldwyn (1882 - 1974)
My parents only had one argument in forty-five years. It lasted forty-three years. ~ Cathy Ladman
Liberty without learning is always in peril; learning without liberty is always in vain. ~ John F. Kennedy
The truth does not change according to our ability to stomach it. ~ Flannery O'Connor (1925 - 1964)
Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself. ~ A. H. Weiler (1909 - 2002)
Hollywood is a place where they place you under contract instead of under observation. ~ Walter Winchell (1897 - 1972)
There is nothing worse than aggressive stupidity. ~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749 - 1832)
An optimist stays up to see the New Year in. A pessimist waits to make sure the old one leaves. ~ Bill Vaughan
There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all. ~ Robert Orben
I'm worried that the universe will soon need replacing. It's not holding a charge. ~ Edward Chilton
Seeing a murder on television... can help work off one's antagonisms. And if you haven't any antagonisms, the commercials will give you some. ~ Alfred Hitchcock (1899 - 1980)
I hate television. I hate it as much as I hate peanuts. But I can't stop eating peanuts. ~ Orson Welles (1915 - 1985)
Democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half the time. ~ E. B. White (1899 - 1985)
The goal of all inanimate objects is to resist man and ultimately defeat him. ~ Russell Baker (1925 - )
Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment. ~ Barry LePatner
Maturity is a bitter disappointment for which no remedy exists, unless laughter can be said to remedy anything. ~ Kurt Vonnegut (1922 - 2007)
Music with dinner is an insult both to the cook and the violinist. ~ G. K. Chesterton (1874 - 1936)
After all, all he did was string together a lot of old, well-known quotations. ~ H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956), on Shakespeare
We don't see things as they are, we see things as we are. ~ Anais Nin (1903 - 1977)
You must not think me necessarily foolish because I am facetious, nor will I consider you necessarily wise because you are grave. ~ Sydney Smith (1771 - 1845)
Vote early and vote often. ~ Al Capone (1899 - 1947)
Anyone who works is a fool. I don't work - I merely inflict myself upon the public. ~ Robert Morley
Dreaming permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of our lives. ~ William Dement
The only way to be truly misogynistic is to be a woman. ~ Randy K. Milholland
I'm an idealist. I don't know where I'm going, but I'm on my way. ~ Carl Sandburg (1878 - 1967)
When a thing has been said and well, have no scruple. Take it and copy it. ~ Anatole France (1844 - 1924)
First you're an unknown, then you write one book and you move up to obscurity. ~ Martin Myers
Here's a tip to avoid death by celebrity: First off, get a life. They can't touch you if you're out doing something interesting. ~ Kent Nichols and Douglas Sarine, Ask a Ninja, Question 55
Acquaintance, n.: A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to. ~ Ambrose Bierce (1842 - 1914)
Estimated amount of glucose used by an adult human brain each day, expressed in M&Ms: 250 ~ Harper's Index, October 1989
In a real dark night of the soul it is always three o'clock in the morning, day after day. ~ F. Scott Fitzgerald (1896 - 1940)
Sanity is a madness put to good use. ~ George Santayana (1863 - 1952)
He played the king as if afraid someone else would play the ace. ~ John Mason Brown (1900 - 1969), drama critic
An honest politician is one who, when he is bought, will stay bought. ~ Simon Cameron (1799 - 1889)
A sense of duty is useful in work, but offensive in personal relations. People wish to be liked, not be endured with patient resignation. ~ Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
My way of joking is to tell the truth. It is the funniest joke in the world. ~ George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950)
The best defense against the atom bomb is not to be there when it goes off. ~ Anonymous
The last time somebody said, 'I find I can write much better with a word processor.', I replied, 'They used to say the same thing about drugs.' ~ Roy Blount Jr.
I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty. ~ George Burns (1896 - 1996)
There comes a time in every man's life and I've had many of them. ~ Casey Stengel (1890 - 1975)
The human race is faced with a cruel choice: work or daytime television. ~ Unknown
Sanity calms, but madness is more interesting. ~ John Russell
People who get nostalgic about childhood were obviously never children. ~ Bill Watterson (1958 - ), Calvin and Hobbes
The great thing about human language is that it prevents us from sticking to the matter at hand. ~ Lewis Thomas (1913 - 1993)
A vacuum is a hell of a lot better than some of the stuff that nature replaces it with. ~ Tennessee Williams (1911 - 1983), Cat on a Hot Tin Roof (1955)
Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped. ~ Sam Levenson (1911 - 1980)
Wagner's music is better than it sounds. ~ Edgar Wilson Nye (1850 - 1896)
Seeing ourselves as others see us would probably confirm our worst suspicions about them. ~ Franklin P. Adams (1881 - 1960)
It is not enough to succeed. Others must fail. ~ Gore Vidal (1925 - )
If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to. ~ Dorothy Parker (1893 - 1967)
I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be. ~ Douglas Adams (1952 - 2001)
Faith is a cop-out. If the only way you can accept an assertion is by faith, then you are conceding that it can’t be taken on its own merits. ~ Dan Barker
jopem
10-07-2009, 10:25 PM
"Hey don't put sugar on that bull and call it candy." - Michael Westen, Burn Notice
An undefined problem has an infinite number of solutions. ~ Robert A. Humphrey
If all else fails, immortality can always be assured by spectacular error. ~ John Kenneth Galbraith
Anybody who watches three games of football in a row should be declared brain dead. ~ Erma Bombeck (1927 - 1996)
We were happily married for eight months. Unfortunately, we were married for four and a half years. ~ Nick Faldo
I felt like poisoning a monk. ~ Umberto Eco (1932 - )
I believe in equality for everyone, except reporters and photographers. ~ Mahatma Gandhi (1869 - 1948 )
A sympathetic Scot summed it all up very neatly in the remark, "You should make a point of trying every experience once, excepting incest and folk dancing." ~ Sir Arnold Bax (1883 - 1953)
I always find it more difficult to say the things I mean than the things I don't. ~ W. Somerset Maugham (1874 - 1965)
Everyone wants to be Cary Grant. Even I want to be Cary Grant. ~ Cary Grant (1904 - 1986)
That all men are equal is a proposition which, at ordinary times, no sane individual has ever given his assent. ~ Aldous Huxley (1894 - 1963)
A marriage is always made up of two people who are prepared to swear that only the other one snores. ~ Terry Pratchett
Who is more busy than he who hath least to do? ~ John Clarke
There's no point in being grown up if you can't be childish sometimes. ~ Doctor Who
I'm just a person trapped inside a woman's body. ~ Elayne Boosler
I love acting. It is so much more real than life. ~ Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900),
All that is human must retrograde if it does not advance. ~ Edward Gibbon (1737 - 1794)
Our constitution protects aliens, drunks and U.S. Senators. ~ Will Rogers (1879 - 1935)
There are only two kinds of scholars; those who love ideas and those who hate them. ~ Emile Chartier
I have read your book and much like it. ~ Moses Hadas (1900 - 1966)
There are some that only employ words for the purpose of disguising their thoughts. ~ Voltaire (1694 - 1778 )
Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest. ~ Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
If all economists were laid end to end, they would not reach a conclusion. ~ George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950)
Television is for appearing on - not for looking at. ~ Noel Coward (1899 - 1973)
If you develop an ear for sounds that are musical it is like developing an ego. You begin to refuse sounds that are not musical and that way cut yourself off from a good deal of experience. ~ John Cage (1912 - 1992)
If you aren't fired with enthusiasm, you will be fired with enthusiasm. ~ Vince Lombardi (1913 - 1970)
I'm too shy to express my sexual needs except over the phone to people I don't know. ~ Garry Shandling (1949 - )
One man alone can be pretty dumb sometimes, but for real bona fide stupidity, there ain't nothin' can beat teamwork. ~ Edward Abbey (1927 - 1989)
Today's scientists have substituted mathematics for experiments, and they wander off through equation after equation, and eventually build a structure which has no relation to reality. ~ Nikola Tesla (1857 - 1943)
A wise man can see more from the bottom of a well than a fool can from a mountain top ~ Unknown
No one really listens to anyone else, and if you try it for a while you'll see why. ~ Mignon McLaughlin
Play: Work that you enjoy doing for nothing. ~ Evan Esar (1899 - 1995)
Equations are the devil's sentences. ~ Stephen Colbert
Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people. ~ W. C. Fields (1880 - 1946)
We must believe in luck. For how else can we explain the success of those we don't like? ~ Jean Cocteau (1889 - 1963)
When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half. ~ Gracie Allen (1906 - 1964)
The world is governed more by appearances than realities, so that it is fully as necessary to seem to know something as to know it. ~ Daniel Webster (1782 - 1852)
I despise the pleasure of pleasing people that I despise. ~ Lady Mary Wortley Montagu (1689 - 1762)
The mind of a bigot is like the pupil of the eye. The more light you shine on it, the more it will contract. ~ Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr. (1841 - 1935)
The desire to take medicine is perhaps the greatest feature which distinguishes man from animals. ~ Sir William Osler (1849 - 1919)
Knowledge is power, if you know it about the right person. ~ Ethel Mumford
A lifetime is more than sufficiently long for people to get what there is of it wrong. ~ Piet Hein (1905 - )
Today's public figures can no longer write their own speeches or books, and there is some evidence that they can't read them either. ~ Gore Vidal (1925 - )
This is like deja vu all over again. ~ Yogi Berra (1925 - )
Before a war military science seems a real science, like astronomy; but after a war it seems more like astrology. ~ Rebecca West (1892 - 1983)
Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate. ~ Thomas Jones (1892 - 1969)
Men who never get carried away should be. ~ Malcolm Forbes (1919 - 1990)
Silence is the virtue of fools. ~ Sir Francis Bacon (1561 - 1626)
An adventure is only an inconvenience rightly considered. An inconvenience is an adventure wrongly considered. ~ G. K. Chesterton (1874 - 1936)
It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read books of quotations. ~ Sir Winston Churchill (1874 - 1965)
It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong. ~ Voltaire (1694 - 1778 )
A lawyer starts life giving $500 worth of law for $5 and ends giving $5 worth for $500. ~ Benjamin H. Brewster (1816 - 1888 )
About the most originality that any writer can hope to achieve honestly is to steal with good judgment. ~ Josh Billings (1818 - 1885)
It is not worth an intelligent man's time to be in the majority. By definition, there are already enough people to do that. ~ G. H. Hardy (1877 - 1947)
All men are frauds. The only difference between them is that some admit it. I myself deny it. ~ H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956)
Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much. ~ Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900)
You cannot slander human nature; it is worse than words can paint it. ~ Charles Haddon Spurgeon (1834 - 1892)
As I was walking up the stair
I met a man who wasn't there.
He wasn't there again today.
I wish, I wish he'd stay away.
~ Hughes Mearns
To be willing to die for an idea is to set a rather high price on conjecture. ~ Anatole France (1844 - 1924)
The significance of man is that he is insignificant and is aware of it. ~ Carl Becker
The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco. ~ Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
If two men agree on everything, you may be sure that one of them is doing the thinking. ~ Lyndon B. Johnson (1908 - 1973)
Tradition is what you resort to when you don't have the time or the money to do it right. ~ Kurt Herbert Alder
In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms. ~ Stephen Jay Gould (1941 - 2002)
If you would be a real seeker after truth, it is necessary that at least once in your life you doubt, as far as possible, all things. ~ Rene Descartes (1596 - 1650)
What we call 'Progress' is the exchange of one nuisance for another nuisance. ~ Havelock Ellis (1859 - 1939)
One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory. ~ Rita Mae Brown
Love is not blind - it sees more, not less. But because it sees more, it is willing to see less. ~ Rabbi Julius Gordon
Silly things do cease to be silly if they are done by sensible people in an impudent way. ~ Jane Austen (1775 - 1817)
It is the final proof of God's omnipotence that he need not exist in order to save us. ~ Peter De Vries
Now and then an innocent man is sent to the legislature. ~ Kin Hubbard (1868 - 1930)
In real life, unlike in Shakespeare, the sweetness of the rose depends upon the name it bears. Things are not only what they are. They are, in very important respects, what they seem to be. ~ Hubert H. Humphrey (1911 - 1978)
There is an evil tendency underlying all our technology - the tendency to do what is reasonable even when it isn't any good. ~ Robert Pirsig
2 is not equal to 3, not even for large values of 2. ~ Grabel's Law
A man with a watch knows what time it is. A man with two watches is never sure. ~ Segal's Law
It is of interest to note that while some dolphins are reported to have learned English -- up to fifty words used in correct context -- no human being has been reported to have learned dolphinese. ~ Carl Sagan (1934 - 1996)
Martyrdom is the only way in which a man can become famous without ability. ~ George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950)
The only reason some people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory. ~ Paul Fix
The main things which seem to me important on their own account, and not merely as means to other things, are knowledge, art, instinctive happiness, and relations of friendship or affection. ~ Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me.
~ Benjamin Disraeli (1804 - 1881)
It is our responsibilities, not ourselves, that we should take seriously. ~ Peter Ustinov (1921 - 2004)
War is not nice. ~ Barbara Bush (1925 - )
All human situations have their inconveniences. We feel those of the present but neither see nor feel those of the future; and hence we often make troublesome changes without amendment, and frequently for the worse. ~ Benjamin Franklin (1706 - 1790)
I am certain there is too much certainty in the world. ~ Michael Crichton (1942 - 2008)
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy and Jill a rich widow. ~ Evan Esar (1899 - 1995)
Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable. ~ Woody Allen (1935 - )
Reality is nothing but a collective hunch. ~ Jane Wagner
I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth. ~ Umberto Eco (1932 - )
Rage is the only quality which has kept me, or anybody I have ever studied, writing columns for newspapers. ~ Jimmy Breslin
Criticism is prejudice made plausible. ~ H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956)
A good friend can tell you what is the matter with you in a minute. He may not seem such a good friend after telling. ~ Arthur Brisbane
I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at parties. Often, as a sign of their great respect, they don't even invite me. ~ Dave Barry (1947 - )
The only thing that scares me more than space aliens is the idea that there aren't any space aliens. We can't be the best that creation has to offer. I pray we're not all there is. If so, we're in big trouble. ~ Ellen DeGeneres
An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field. ~ Niels Bohr (1885 - 1962)
I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. ~ Noel Coward (1899 - 1973)
Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily this is not difficult. ~ Charlotte Whitton
The government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it. ~ Ronald Reagan (1911 - 2004)
Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch. ~ W. C. Fields (1880 - 1946)
They certainly give very strange names to diseases. ~ Plato (427 BC - 347 BC)
No one who cannot rejoice in the discovery of his own mistakes deserves to be called a scholar. ~ Donald Foster
The will to be stupid is a very powerful force, but there are always alternatives. ~ Lois McMaster Bujold
Art is making something out of nothing and selling it. ~ Frank Zappa (1940 - 1993)
The trouble with normal is it always gets worse. ~ Bruce Cockburn
Never have children, only grandchildren. ~ Gore Vidal (1925 - )
Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind- bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the chemist's, but that's just peanuts to space. ~ Douglas Adams (1952 - 2001)
Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter because nobody listens. ~ Nick Diamos
Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch. ~ Robert Orben
Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance. ~ Will Durant (1885 - 1981)
The greater the ignorance the greater the dogmatism. ~ Sir William Osler (1849 - 1919)
"I stand for myself; no great connexion to support me if inclined to fall; therefore my good name as a man, and officer, and an Englishman, I must be very careful of. My greatest pride is to discharge my duty faithfully; my greatest ambition to receive approbation for my conduct." ~ Horatio Nelson March 1785 in a letter to Lord Sydney.
There is no abstract art. You must always start with something. Afterward you can remove all traces of reality. ~ Pablo Picasso (1881 - 1973)
I looked always outside of myself to see what I could make the world give me instead of looking within myself to see what was there. ~ Belle Livingstone
Better to rely on one powerful king than on many little princes. ~ Jean de La Fontaine (1621 - 1695)
In preparing for battle I have always found that plans are useless, but planning is indispensable. ~ Dwight D. Eisenhower (1890 - 1969)
To love deeply in one direction makes us more loving in all others. ~ Anne Sophie Swetchine
SYMBOLIC, adj. Pertaining to symbols and the use and interpretation of symbols.
They say 'tis conscience feels compunction;
I hold that that's the stomach's function,
For of the sinner I have noted
That when he's sinned he's somewhat bloated,
Or ill some other ghastly fashion
Within that bowel of compassion.
True, I believe the only sinner
Is he that eats a shabby dinner.
You know how Adam with good reason,
For eating apples out of season,
Was "cursed." But that is all symbolic: The truth is, Adam had the colic.
~ G.J. Ambrose Bierce (1842 - 1914)
Whether they give or refuse, it delights women just the same to have been asked. ~ Ovid (43 BC - 17 AD)
The greatest test of courage on earth is to bear defeat without losing heart. ~ Robert Ingersoll (1833 - 1899)
Once a government is committed to the principle of silencing the voice of opposition, it has only one way to go, and that is down the path of increasingly repressive measures, until it becomes a source of terror to all its citizens and creates a country where everyone lives in fear. ~ Harry S Truman (1884 - 1972)
My own suspicion is that the universe is not only queerer than we suppose, but queerer than we *can* suppose. ~ J. B. S. Haldane (1892 - 1964)
If we have the opportunity to be generous with our hearts, ourselves, we have no idea of the depth and breadth of love's reach. ~ Margaret Cho
Behind every great fortune there is a crime. ~ Honore de Balzac (1799 - 1850)
Never expose yourself unnecessarily to danger; a miracle may not save you...and if it does, it will be deducted from your share of luck or merit. ~ The Talmud
Don't be sweet, lest you be eaten up; don't be bitter, lest you be spewed out. ~ Jewish Proverb
Even the fear of death is nothing compared to the fear of not having lived authentically and fully. ~ Frances Moore Lappe
The trouble in corporate America is that too many people with too much power live in a box (their home), then travel the same road every day to another box (their office). ~ Faith Popcorn
People who are 'ready' give off a different vibe than people who aren't. Animals can smell fear; maybe that's it.
The minute you become ready is the the minute you stop dreaming. Suddenly it's no longer about 'becoming'. Suddenly it's about 'doing'. ~ Hugh Macleod
The victory of success is half won when one gains the habit of setting goals and achieving them. Even the most tedious chore will become endurable as you parade through each day convinced that every task, no matter how menial or boring, brings you closer to fulfilling your dreams. ~ Og Mandino (1923 - 1996)
I look at what the phone company does and do the opposite. ~ Craig Newmark (1952 - )
Poetry often enters through the window of irrelevance. ~ M. C. Richards
The case has, in some respects, been not entirely devoid of interest. ~ Sir Arthur Conan Doyle (1859 - 1930), (Sherlock Holmes)
Life is a long lesson in humility. ~ James M. Barrie (1860 - 1937)
The only sure thing about luck is that it will change. ~ Bret Harte (1836 - 1902)
Fallacies do not cease to be fallacies because they become fashions. ~ G. K. Chesterton (1874 - 1936)
There is always a well-known solution to every human problem--neat, plausible, and wrong. ~ H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956)
There art two cardinal sins from which all others spring: Impatience and Laziness. ~ Franz Kafka (1883 - 1924)
The love of truth lies at the root of much humor. ~ Robertson Davies
Every great advance in natural knowledge has involved the absolute rejection of authority. ~ Thomas H. Huxley (1825 - 1895)
I enjoy being a highly overpaid actor. ~ Roger Moore (1927 - )
Time is that quality of nature which keeps events from happening all at once. Lately it doesn't seem to be working. ~ Anonymous
You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club. ~ Jack London (1876 - 1916)
Cocaine is God's way of saying that you're making too much money. ~ Robin Williams (1951 - )
I bought some batteries, but they weren't included. ~ Steven Wright (1955 - )
By the time we've made it, we've had it. ~ Malcolm Forbes (1919 - 1990)
Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday. ~ Don Marquis (1878 - 1937)
If we were not all so interested in ourselves, life would be so uninteresting that none of us would be able to endure it. ~ Arthur Schopenhauer (1788 - 1860)
There are more pleasant things to do than beat up people. ~ Muhammad Ali (1942 - )
Health food makes me sick. ~ Calvin Trillin (1935 - )
Men who are unhappy, like men who sleep badly, are always proud of the fact. ~ Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
Rational arguments don't usually work on religious people. Otherwise, there wouldn't be religious people. ~ Doris Egan
Government is too big and too important to be left to the politicians. ~ Chester Bowles (1901 - 1986)
I don't know why we are here, but I'm pretty sure that it is not in order to enjoy ourselves. ~ Ludwig Wittgenstein (1889 - 1951)
Read, every day, something no one else is reading. Think, every day, something no one else is thinking. Do, every day, something no one else would be silly enough to do. It is bad for the mind to be always part of unanimity. ~ Christopher Morley (1890 - 1957)
A man's respect for law and order exists in precise relationship to the size of his paycheck. ~ Adam Clayton Powell Jr. (1908 - 1972)
You can't say that civilization don't advance, however, for in every war they kill you in a new way. ~ Will Rogers (1879 - 1935)
The men who really believe in themselves are all in lunatic asylums. ~ G. K. Chesterton (1874 - 1936)
When I do good, I feel good; when I do bad, I feel bad, and that is my religion. ~ Abraham Lincoln (1809 - 1865), (attributed)
A perpetual holiday is a good working definition of hell. ~ George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950)
Fig Newton: The force required to accelerate a fig 39.37 inches per sec. ~ J. Hart (1931 - )
My mother buried three husbands, and two of them were just napping. ~ Rita Rudner
First things first, but not necessarily in that order. ~ Doctor Who
With most men, unbelief in one thing springs from blind belief in another. ~ Georg Christoph Lichtenberg (1742 - 1799)
There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line. ~ Oscar Levant (1906 - 1972)
The conception of two people living together for twenty-five years without having a cross word suggests a lack of spirit only to be admired in sheep. ~ Alan Patrick Herbert
I loathe the expression "What makes him tick." It is the American mind, looking for simple and singular solution, that uses the foolish expression. A person not only ticks, he also chimes and strikes the hour, falls and breaks and has to be put together again, and sometimes stops like an electric clock in a thunderstorm. ~ James Thurber (1894 - 1961)
The most radical revolutionary will become a conservative the day after the revolution. ~ Hannah Arendt (1906 - 1975)
Ninety-eight percent of the adults in this country are decent, hard-working, honest Americans. It's the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity. But then--we elected them. ~ Lily Tomlin (1939 - )
I'm just trying to make a smudge on the collective unconscious. ~ David Letterman (1947 - )
Give me the luxuries of life and I will willingly do without the necessities. ~ Frank Lloyd Wright (1869 - 1959)
I never took hallucinogenic drugs because I never wanted my consciousness expanded one unnecessary iota. ~ Fran Lebowitz (1950 - )
After the last of 16 mounting screws has been removed from an access cover, it will be discovered that the wrong access cover has been removed. ~ De La Lastra's Law
Those who welcome death have only tried it from the ears up. ~ Wilson Mizner (1876 - 1933)
In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice; In practice, there is. ~ Chuck Reid
Charm is the quality in others that makes us more satisfied with ourselves. ~ Henri-Frédéric Amiel
Actions lie louder than words. ~ Carolyn Wells
Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted a whole day. ~ Mickey Rooney (1920 - )
There is no fate that cannot be surmounted by scorn. ~ Albert Camus (1913 - 1960)
I have long been of the opinion that if work were such a splendid thing the rich would have kept more of it for themselves. ~ Bruce Grocott (1940 - )
Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but the thing dies in the process and the innards are discouraging to any but the pure scientific mind. ~ E. B. White (1899 - 1985), Some Remarks on Humor, introduction
Nothing fixes a thing so intensely in the memory as the wish to forget it. ~ Michel de Montaigne (1533 - 1592)
A desk is a dangerous place from which to watch the world. ~ John le Carre (1931 - )
A girl phoned me the other day and said "Come on over, there's nobody home." I went over. Nobody was home. ~ Rodney Dangerfield (1921 - 2004)
My fellow Americans, I am pleased to tell you I just signed legislation which outlaws Russia forever. The bombing begins in five minutes. ~ Ronald Reagan (1911 - 2004), Said during a radio microphone test, 1984
I have never met a man so ignorant that I couldn't learn something from him. ~ Galileo Galilei (1564 - 1642)
I have given two cousins to war and I stand ready to sacrifice my wife's brother. ~ Artemus Ward (1834 - 1867)
No wise man ever wished to be younger. ~ Jonathan Swift (1667 - 1745)
I've known what it is to be hungry, but I always went right to a restaurant. ~ Ring Lardner (1885 - 1933)
If you can find something everyone agrees on, it's wrong. ~ Mo Udall
Happiness is not achieved by the conscious pursuit of happiness; it is generally the by-product of other activities. ~ Aldous Huxley (1894 - 1963)
What you do speaks so loud that I cannot hear what you say. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 - 1882)
How can you govern a country which has 246 varieties of cheese? ~ Charles De Gaulle (1890 - 1970), in "Les Mots du General", 1962
Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some abuse the privilege. ~ Unknown
In this business you either sink or swim or you don't. ~ David Smith
Sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast. ~ Lewis Carroll (1832 - 1898)
I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks. ~ Steve Martin (1945 - )
Television news is like a lightning flash. It makes a loud noise, lights up everything around it, leaves everything else in darkness and then is suddenly gone. ~ Hodding Carter
Politics is not the art of the possible. It consists in choosing between the disastrous and the unpalatable. ~ John Kenneth Galbraith (1908 - 2006)
The reserve of modern assertions is sometimes pushed to extremes, in which the fear of being contradicted leads the writer to strip himself of almost all sense and meaning. ~ Sir Winston Churchill (1874 - 1965)
Harbor Master
12-31-2009, 08:52 PM
A kleptomaniac is a person who helps himself because he can't help himself. ~ Henry Morgan
My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. ~ Ronnie Shakes
These days an income is something you can't live without--or within. ~ Tom Wilson, "Ziggy" (comic)
Nature is trying very hard to make us succeed, but nature does not depend on us. We are not the only experiment. ~ R. Buckminster Fuller (1895 - 1983)
Things are only impossible until they're not. ~ Jean-Luc Picard, 'Star Trek: The Next Generation'
If God had really intended men to fly, he'd make it easier to get to the airport. ~ George Winters
You don't have to suffer to be a poet; adolescence is enough suffering for anyone. ~ John Ciardi (1916 - 1986)
Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted. ~ Martin Luther King Jr. (1929 - 1968)
I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: 'O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous.' And God granted it. ~ Voltaire (1694 - 1778 )
Both the cockroach and the bird would get along very well without us, although the cockroach would miss us most. ~ Joseph Wood Krutch (1893 - 1970)
There is only one thing a philosopher can be relied upon to do, and that is to contradict other philosophers. ~ William James (1842 - 1910)
Confusion is always the most honest response. ~ Marty Indik
I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man, and I hate people like that! ~ Tom Lehrer (1928 - )
Most men pursue pleasure with such breathless haste that they hurry past it. ~ Soren Kierkegaard (1813 - 1855)
If you live long enough, the venerability factor creeps in; first, you get accused of things you never did, and later, credited for virtues you never had. ~ I. F. Stone (1907 - 1989)
Writing gives you the illusion of control, and then you realize it's just an illusion, that people are going to bring their own stuff into it. ~ David Sedaris
The only difference between the Democrats and the Republicans is that the Democrats allow the poor to be corrupt, too. ~ Oscar Levant (1906 - 1972)
I find nothing more depressing than optimism. ~ Paul Fussell
No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation. ~ Fran Lebowitz (1950 - )
I gotta work out. I keep saying it all the time. I keep saying I gotta start working out. It's been about two months since I've worked out. And I just don't have the time. Which uh..is odd. Because I have the time to go out to dinner. And uh..and watch tv. And get a bone density test. And uh.. try to figure out what my phone number spells in words. ~ Ellen DeGeneres
Any fool can tell the truth, but it requires a man of some sense to know how to lie well. ~ Samuel Butler (1835 - 1902)
There are plenty of good five-cent cigars in the country. The trouble is they cost a quarter. What this country needs is a good five-cent nickel. ~ Franklin P. Adams (1881 - 1960)
Mathematics, rightly viewed, possesses not only truth, but supreme beauty - a beauty cold and austere, like that of sculpture. ~ Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
No one can earn a million dollars honestly. ~ William Jennings Bryan (1860 - 1925)
I tend to live in the past because most of my life is there. ~ Herb Caen
Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse. ~ Thomas Szasz
You don't get anything clean without getting something else dirty. ~ Cecil Baxter
Character is what you have left when you've lost everything you can lose. ~ Evan Esar (1899 - 1995)
Punctuality is the virtue of the bored. ~ Evelyn Waugh (1903 - 1966)
Art is a collaboration between God and the artist, and the less the artist does the better. ~ Andre Gide (1869 - 1951)
People who have no weaknesses are terrible; there is no way of taking advantage of them. ~ Anatole France (1844 - 1924)
But in this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes. ~ Benjamin Franklin (1706 - 1790)
More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly. ~ Woody Allen (1935 - )
I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place. ~ Steven Wright (1955 - )
Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory. ~ Albert Schweitzer (1875 - 1965)
By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he's wrong. ~ Charles Wadsworth
The reason there are so few female politicians is that it is too much trouble to put makeup on two faces. ~ Maureen Murphy
A hypocrite is a person who--but who isn't? ~ Don Marquis (1878 - 1937)
Silence propagates itself, and the longer talk has been suspended, the more difficult it is to find anything to say. ~ Samuel Johnson (1709 - 1784)
Reality continues to ruin my life. ~ Bill Watterson (1958 - )
All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure. ~ Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
There is no cure for birth and death save to enjoy the interval. ~ George Santayana (1863 - 1952)
Thirty-five is a very attractive age. London society is full of women of the very highest birth who have, of their own free choice, remained thirty-five for years. ~ Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900)
The only thing that overcomes hard luck is hard work. ~ Harry Golden (1902 - 1981)
Whenever I hear anyone arguing for slavery, I feel a strong impulse to see it tried on him personally. ~ Abraham Lincoln (1809 - 1865)
It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers. ~ James Thurber (1894 - 1961)
University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small. ~ Henry Kissinger (1923 - )
A joke's a very serious thing. ~ Charles Churchill,
If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt. ~ Dean Martin
Dying is a very dull, dreary affair. And my advice to you is to have nothing whatever to do with it. ~ W. Somerset Maugham (1874 - 1965)
I believe that banking institutions are more dangerous to our liberties than standing armies. ~ Thomas Jefferson (1743 - 1826)
To read a newspaper is to refrain from reading something worthwhile. The first discipline of education must therefore be to refuse resolutely to feed the mind with canned chatter. ~ Aleister Crowley (1875 - 1947)
The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling. ~ Ambrose Bierce (1842 - 1914), The Devil's Dictionary
If winning isn't everything, why do they keep score? ~ Vince Lombardi (1913 - 1970)
Laughing at our mistakes can lengthen our own life. Laughing at someone else's can shorten it. ~ Cullen Hightower
I look to the future because that's where I'm going to spend the rest of my life. ~ George Burns (1896 - 1996)
Music with dinner is an insult both to the cook and the violinist. ~ G. K. Chesterton (1874 - 1936)
Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say that what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. ~ Russell Baker (1925 - )
An economist is a man who states the obvious in terms of the incomprehensible. ~ Alfred A. Knopf
The power of hiding ourselves from one another is mercifully given, for men are wild beasts, and would devour one another but for this protection. ~ Henry Ward Beecher (1813 - 1887)
Spare no expense to save money on this one. ~ Samuel Goldwyn (1882 - 1974)
Bureaucrats write memoranda both because they appear to be busy when they are writing and because the memos, once written, immediately become proof that they were busy. ~ Charles Peters
History is more or less bunk. ~ Henry Ford (1863 - 1947)
Critics search for ages for the wrong word, which, to give them credit, they eventually find. ~ Peter Ustinov (1921 - 2004)
I don't know if God exists, but it would be better for His reputation if He didn't. ~ Jules Renard (1864 - 1910)
Chess is as elaborate a waste of human intelligence as you can find outside an advertising agency. ~ Raymond Chandler (1888 - 1959)
In archaeology you uncover the unknown. In diplomacy you cover the known. ~ Thomas Pickering (1931 - )
The more original a discovery, the more obvious it seems afterwards. ~ Arthur Koestler (1905 - 1983)
There are many who dare not kill themselves for fear of what the neighbors will say. ~ Cyril Connolly (1903 - 1974)
The squeaking wheel doesn't always get the grease. Sometimes it gets replaced. ~ Vic Gold
The time not to become a father is eighteen years before a war. ~ E. B. White (1899 - 1985)
Computer games don't affect kids, I mean if Pac Man affected us as kids, we'd all be running around in darkened rooms, munching pills and listening to repetitive music. ~ Marcus Brigstocke
The shortest distance between two points is under construction. ~ Noelie Altito
For most men life is a search for the proper manila envelope in which to get themselves filed. ~ Clifton Fadiman (1904 - 1999)
Life being what it is, one dreams of revenge. ~ Paul Gauguin (1848 - 1903)
Some of the worst mistakes of my life have been haircuts. ~ Jim Morrison (1943 - 1971)
It is only possible to live happily ever after on a day-to-day basis. ~ Margaret Bonnano
It's all right letting yourself go as long as you can let yourself back. ~ Mick Jagger (1943 - )
If I have seen further it is by standing on the shoulders of giants. ~ Isaac Newton (1642 - 1727)
When I came back to Dublin I was courtmartialed in my absence and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence. ~ Brendan Behan (1923 - 1964)
you've got to cry without weeping,
talk without speaking,
scream without raising your voice
~ U2, The Joshua Three
...the safest course is to do nothing against one's conscience. With this secret, we can enjoy life and have no fear from death. ~ Voltaire (1694 - 1778 )
All I can say about life is, Oh God, enjoy it! ~ Bob Newhart (1929 - )
The strongest principle of growth lies in human choice. ~ George Eliot (1819 - 1880)
Unless you believe, you will not understand. ~ Saint Augustine (354 AD - 430 AD), De Libero Arbitrio
All things are difficult before they are easy. ~ Dr. Thomas Fuller (1654 - 1734)
I is the first letter of the alphabet, the first word of the language, the first thought of the mind, the first object of affection. In grammar it is a pronoun of the first person and singular number. Its plural is said to be _We_, but how there can be more than one myself is doubtless clearer the grammarians than it is to the author of this incomparable dictionary. Conception of two myselfs is difficult, but fine. The frank yet graceful use of "I" distinguishes a good writer from a bad; the latter carries it with the manner of a thief trying to cloak his loot. ~ Ambrose Bierce (1842 - 1914)
Humor is a rubber sword - it allows you to make a point without drawing blood. ~ Mary Hirsch
There is only one thing a philosopher can be relied upon to do, and that is to contradict other philosophers. ~ William James (1842 - 1910)
I've never been a millionaire but I just know I'd be darling at it. ~ Dorothy Parker (1893 - 1967)
Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves. ~ Abraham Lincoln (1809 - 1865)
Brass bands are all very well in their place - outdoors and several miles away.~ Sir Thomas Beecham (1879 - 1961)
If knowledge can create problems, it is not through ignorance that we can solve them. ~ Isaac Asimov (1920 - 1992)
There are lots of ways of being miserable, but there's only one way of being comfortable, and that is to stop running round after happiness. If you make up your mind not to be happy there's no reason why you shouldn't have a fairly good time. ~ Edith Wharton (1862 - 1937)
Grown-ups never understand anything for themselves, and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explaining things to them. ~ Antoine de Saint-Exupery (1900 - 1944)
Thank you for sending me a copy of your book. I'll waste no time reading it. ~ Moses Hadas (1900 - 1966)
I prefer the company of peasants because they have not been educated sufficiently to reason incorrectly. ~ Michel de Montaigne (1533 - 1592)
Do I contradict myself?
Very well then I contradict myself,
(I am large, I contain multitudes.)
Walt Whitman (1819 - 1892)
Fortune can, for her pleasure, fools advance, And toss them on the wheels of Chance. ~ Juvenal (55 AD - 127 AD)
We are the people our parents warned us about. ~ Jimmy Buffett
There is nothing more demoralizing than a small but adequate income. ~ Edmund Wilson (1895 - 1972)
Devotees of grammatical studies have not been distinguished for any very remarkable felicities of expression. ~ Amos Bronson Alcott (1799 - 1888 )
I'll walk where my own nature would be leading;
it vexes me to choose another guide.
~~ Emily Bronte
I am not my memories. I am my dreams.
~~ Terry Hostetler
Life isn't about finding yourself, its about creating yourself.
~~ George Bernard Shaw
Yesterday I dared to struggle. Today, I dare to win.
~~ Bernadette Devlin
Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation. ~ Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900)
Liberty without learning is always in peril; learning without liberty is always in vain. ~ John F. Kennedy (1917 - 1963)
None are so busy as the fool and knave. ~ John Dryden (1631 - 1700)
You give my regards to St. Peter, or whoever has his job, but in Hell. ~ Joss Whedon, Zack Whedon, Maurissa Tancharoen, and Jed Whedon - Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog, 2008
Thought Dorella might like this one...
"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing." ~ Edmund Burke
Dorella Allerod
03-09-2010, 10:11 PM
Indeed. Whee! ;)
The nice thing about being a celebrity is that when you bore people, they think it's their fault. ~ Henry Kissinger (1923 - )
Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a joke about a father-in-law? ~ **** Clark
Good taste is the worst vice ever invented. ~ Edith Sitwell (1887 - 1964)
Feed a fever, starve a cold. Lightly sup with rickets. ~ Takayuki Ikkaku, Arisa Hosaka and Toshihiro Kawabata
Good breeding consists of concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person. ~ Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
I just need enough to tide me over until I need more. ~ Bill Hoest
About the most originality that any writer can hope to achieve honestly is to steal with good judgment. ~ Josh Billings (1818 - 1885)
No man needs a vacation so much as the man who has just had one. ~ Elbert Hubbard (1856 - 1915)
All animals are equal but some animals are more equal than others. ~ George Orwell (1903 - 1950) "Animal Farm"
If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee. ~ Abraham Lincoln (1809 - 1865)
The secret of eternal youth is arrested development. ~ Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884 - 1980)
A husband is like a fire, he goes out when unattended. ~ Evan Esar (1899 - 1995)
The universe is a big place, perhaps the biggest. ~ Kilgore Trout
The pursuit of happiness is a most ridiculous phrase; if you pursue happiness you'll never find it. ~ C. P. Snow (1905 - 1980)
The reason lightning doesn't strike twice in the same place is that the same place isn't there the second time. ~ Willie Tyler
Don't worry about people stealing an idea. If it's original, you will have to ram it down their throats. ~ Howard Aiken (1900 - 1973)
"This world, which has the potential to be Eden, is instead the hell before Hell. In our arrogance, we have made it so."
— Dean Koontz (http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/9355.Dean_Koontz) (Forever Odd (http://www.goodreads.com/book/quotes/16433))
"If God is an author and the universe is the biggest novel ever written, I may feel as if I'm the lead character in the story, but like every man and woman on Earth, I am a suporting player in one of billions of subplots. You know what happens to supporting players. Too often they are killed off in chapter 3, or in chapter 10, or in chapter 35. A supporting player always has to be looking over his shoulder."
— Dean Koontz (http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/9355.Dean_Koontz) (Life Expectancy (http://www.goodreads.com/book/quotes/16435))
"If we were always conscious of the fact that people precious to us are frighteningly mortal, hanging not even by a thread, but by a wisp of gossamer, perhaps we would be kinder to them and more grateful for the love and friendship they give to us."
— Dean Koontz (http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/9355.Dean_Koontz) (Seize the Night (http://www.goodreads.com/book/quotes/21362))
"Human beings can always be relied upon to exert, with vigor, their God-given right to be stupid. "
— Dean Koontz (http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/9355.Dean_Koontz)
"Envy, envy eats them alive. If you had money, they’d envy you that. But since you don’t, they envy you for having such a good, bright, loving daughter. They envy you for just being a happy man. They envy you for not envying them. One of the greatest sorrows of human existence is that some people aren’t happy merely to be alive but find their happiness only in the misery of others."
— Dean Koontz (http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/9355.Dean_Koontz) (Lightning (http://www.goodreads.com/book/quotes/32424))
Get the facts, or the facts will get you. And when you get them, get them right, or they will get you wrong. ~ Dr. Thomas Fuller (1654 - 1734)
It is a great ability to be able to conceal one's ability. ~ Francois de La Rochefoucauld (1613 - 1680), Maxims, 1665
At a dinner party one should eat wisely but not too well, and talk well but not too wisely. ~ W. Somerset Maugham (1874 - 1965)
All of us failed to match our dreams of perfection. So I rate us on the basis of our splendid failure to do the impossible. ~ William Faulkner (1897 - 1962)
If all the cars in the United States were placed end to end, it would probably be Labor Day Weekend. ~ Doug Larson
Nothing great in the world has been accomplished without passion. ~ Georg Wilhelm
In the end, we decide if we're remembered for what happened to us or for what we did with it. ~ Randy K. Milholland
When you feel in your gut what you are and then dynamically pursue it - don't back down and don't give up - then you're going to mystify a lot of folks. ~ Bob Dylan (1941 - )
AlPrunty
04-19-2010, 03:48 AM
All from Phyllis Diller... a comedian that was well known in the 1960's and 70's. And some of them are strangely profound...
"Housework never killed anyone, but I'm not taking chances."
"A Smile is a curve that sets everything straight."
"Aim high, and you won't shoot your foot off."
"A Batchelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once."
"Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home."
"Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed."
"The best way to get rid of Kitchen odors: Eat Out!"
"Burt Reynolds once asked me out... I was in his room."
"Cleaning house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing."
"His finest hour lasted a minute and a half."
"I admit, I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away."
"I ask the waiter, "is this milk fresh?" He said, "Lady, three hours ago it was grass."
"I buried a lot of my iorning in the back yard."
"I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them."
"I'm 18 years behind in my ironing."
"I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about short and cheap?"
"If it weren't for baseball, many kids wouldn't know what a millionaire looked like."
"It's a good thing that beauty is only skin deep, or I'd be rotten to the core."
"Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going."
"My cooking is so bad that my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor."
"My mother in law had a pain beneath her leaft breast. Turned out to be a trick knee."
"My photographs don't do me justice... they look just like me.
"My recipe for dealing with anger and frustration: set the kitchen timer for twenty minutes, cry, rant, and rave, and at the sound of the bell, simmer down and go about business as usual. "
"Never go to bed mad... stay up and fight."
"Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves."
"Our dog died from licking our wedding picture."
"The real reason your pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing at you."
"The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public."
"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. I don't see why that's a problem?"
"There's so little money in my bank account, my scenic checks show a ghetto."
"Tranquilizers work only if you follow the advice on the bottle - keep away from children."
"We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up."
"What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day."
"Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight."
"You know you're old if they have discontinued your blood type."
"You know you're old if your walker has an airbag."
Phyllis Diller (born Phyllis Ada Driver; July 17, 1917) is an American actress and comedienne. She created a stage persona of a wild-haired, eccentrically-dressed housewife who makes jokes about a husband named "Fang" while smoking from a long cigarette holder. Diller is credited with opening the doors of stand-up comedy to women.
Admiration, n.: Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves. ~ Ambrose Bierce (1842 - 1914)
Time is that quality of nature which keeps events from happening all at once. Lately it doesn't seem to be working. ~ Anonymous
Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more. ~ Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
I am always doing that which I can not do, in order that I may learn how to do it. ~ Pablo Picasso (1881 - 1973)
Why can't they invent something for us to marry instead of WOMEN? ~ Fred Flintstone
The visionary lies to himself, the liar only to others. ~ Friedrich Nietzsche (1844 - 1900)
To give anything less than your best is to sacrifice the gift. ~ Steve Prefontaine
Always hold your head up, but be careful to keep your nose at a friendly level. ~ Max L. Forman
Making the simple complicated is commonplace; making the complicated simple, awesomely simple, that's creativity. ~ Charles Mingus
Admonish thy friends in secret, praise them openly. ~ Publilius Syrus (~100 BC)
If everyone demanded peace instead of another television set, then there'd be peace. ~ John Lennon (1940 - 1980)
In actual life every great enterprise begins with and takes its first forward step in faith. ~ Friedrich Von Schlegel
Strong feelings do not necessarily make a strong character. The strength of a man is to be measured by the power of the feelings he subdues not by the power of those which subdue him. ~ William Carleton
Not by wrath does one kill, but by laughter. ~ Friedrich Nietzsche (1844 - 1900)
Here's one made famous by Steel Magnolias that hit my In Box this morning:
"If you can't say anything good about someone,
sit right here beside me."
~~ Alice Roosevelt Longworth
Jordan
06-08-2010, 11:02 AM
Been looking for this thread since yesterday LOL, so here's mine:
"What we do for ourselves dies with us. What we do for others and the world remains and is immortal." - Albert Pine
The world is governed more by appearances than realities, so that it is fully as necessary to seem to know something as to know it. ~ Daniel Webster (1782 - 1852)
Art, like morality, consists of drawing the line somewhere. ~ G. K. Chesterton (1874 - 1936)
Cats regard people as warmblooded furniture. ~ Jacquelyn Mitchard
Men's arguments often prove nothing but their wishes. ~ C. C. Colton
The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about. ~ Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900)
Never compare your inside with somebody else's outside. ~ Hugh Macleod
Justice is the greatest interest of man on earth. ~ Daniel Webster (1782 - 1852)
If it bleeds, you can kill it ~ Predator
Many people weigh the guilt they will feel against the pleasure of the forbidden action they want to take. ~ Peter McWilliams
Beauty is a precious trace that eternity causes to appear to us and that it takes away from us. A manifestation of eternity, and a sign of death as well. ~ Eugene Ionesco (1909 - 1994)
LongHall said we needed to keep this quote:
they have ran me through the scanner so many times I'm beginning to think they are trying to make photocopies of me.
Tezal
07-09-2010, 05:31 AM
"The only man who never makes a mistake is the man who never does anything."-
Theodore Roosevelt
A stitch in time would have confused Einstein. ~ Unknown
Progress might have been all right once, but it has gone on too long. ~ Ogden Nash (1902 - 1971)
People seem to enjoy things more when they know a lot of other people have been left out of the pleasure. ~ Russell Baker (1925 - )
Originality is the fine art of remembering what you hear but forgetting where you heard it. ~ Laurence J. Peter (1919 - 1988)
What is more mortifying than to feel that you have missed the plum for want of courage to shake the tree? ~ Logan Pearsall Smith (1865 - 1946)
How frequently are the honesty and integrity of a man disposed of by a smile or a shrug. How many good and generous actions have been sunk into oblivion by a distrustful look, or stamped with the imputation of bad motives, by a mysterious and seasonable whisper! ~ Sterne
Know how to listen, and you will profit even from those who talk badly. ~ Plutarch (46 AD - 120 AD)
Always seek out the seed of triumph in every adversity. ~ Og Mandino (1923 - 1996)
Strange how the older generations can't program a VCR if their life depended on it, but they managed to operate the climate contol system of their 1958 Ramblers, which consisted of six unmarked knobs, one labeled "AirFloMatic" in unreadable cursive script, and four levers underneath the dash, which you had to turn, then pull. ~ Dan Tasman
Die my dear Doctor? That's the last thing I shall do! ~ Henery John Temple Palmerston, last words, Prime Minister of GB (1855-1858 and 1859-1865)
Even in civilized mankind faint traces of monogamous instincts can be perceived. ~ Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
All romantics meet the same fate someday. Cynical and drunk and boring someone in some dark cafe. ~ Joni Mitchell, song-The Last Time I Saw Richard
All the sounds of the earth are like music. ~ Oscar Hammerstein II
And there's this burning like there's always been, I've never been so alone and I've never been so alive. ~ Third Eye Blind, (musical group)
Ressi
07-17-2010, 08:33 AM
"Love is like a snowmobile traveling across the tundra, suddenly it flips over trapping you underneath. At night the ice weasels come." - Matt Groening (creator of 'The Simpsons' and 'Futurama')
Memories may show us the path we've taken to become who we are. But they, themselves, are not who we are now. ~ Kaziarl
From SB Haven Mission 04 Flyspecks
This was profound enough for my wall on facebook
Accomplishing the impossible means only that the boss will add it to your regular duties. ~ Doug Larson
I have often depended on the blindness of strangers. ~ Adrienne E. Gusoff
We have really everything in common with America nowadays except, of course, language. ~ Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900)
The scientists of today think deeply instead of clearly. One must be sane to think clearly, but one can think deeply and be quite insane. ~ Nikola Tesla (1857 - 1943)
A censor is a man who knows more than he thinks you ought to. ~ Granville Hicks (1901 - 1982)
A complex system that works is invariably found to have evolved from a simple system that works. ~ John Gaule
Any woman who thinks the way to a man's heart is through his stomach is aiming about 10 inches too high. ~ Adrienne E. Gusoff
Read over your compositions, and wherever you meet with a passage which you think is particularly fine, strike it out. ~ Samuel Johnson (1709 - 1784)
The world is round; it has no point. ~ Adrienne E. Gusoff
A man with a watch knows what time it is. A man with two watches is never sure. ~ Segal's Law
If you aren't fired with enthusiasm, you will be fired with enthusiasm. ~ Vince Lombardi (1913 - 1970)
The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right place but to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment. ~ Dorothy Nevill
A true friend is the greatest of all blessings, and that which we take the least care of all to acquire. ~ Francois de La Rochefoucauld (1613 - 1680)
Valentine
09-05-2010, 02:47 PM
Perhaps not so thought inspiring but topical.
"Wherever there is a fathom of water, there you will find the Royal Navy."
-Allegedly a disgruntled Napoleon Bonaparte during the highly successful blockade of French shipping, and after another successful; British boat action in disputed Canada.
The Royal Navy of England hath ever been its greatest defence and ornament; it is its ancient and natural strength; the floating bulwark of the island.
William Blackstone
Ressi
09-11-2010, 08:38 AM
"We have failed to uphold Brannigan's Law. However I did make it with a hot alien babe. And in the end, is that not what man has dreamt of since first he looked up at the stars? " - Capt. Zapp Brannigan
Ressi
09-12-2010, 09:43 AM
"If we can hit that bull's-eye the rest of the dominoes will fall like a house of cards, Checkmate!" - Captain Zapp Brannigan
"They were in the wrong place, at the wrong time - so naturally, they became heroes." - Leia Organa of Alderaan Senator
To be one's self, and unafraid whether right or wrong, is more admirable than the easy cowardice of surrender to conformity. ~ Irving Wallace
Preach not to others what they should eat, but eat as becomes you, and be silent. ~ Epictetus (55 AD - 135 AD)
How dare the Gods work against me! I don't remember giving them permission. ~ Reacher Gilt (Going Postal)
Yet, if I know my own thoughts, it is not for myself, or on my own account chiefly, that I feel the sting and the disappointment! No! it is for my brave officers; for my noble-minded friends and comrades. Such a gallant set of fellows! Such a band of brothers! My heart swells at the thought of them ~ Rear-Admiral Horatio Nelson (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Horatio_Nelson,_1st_Viscount_Nelson)
His ( Captain Alexander Ball ) activity and zeal are eminently conspicuous even amongst the Band of Brothers - each, as I may have occasion to mention them, must call forth my gratitude and admiration. ~ Rear-Admiral Horatio Nelson
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nelson%27s_Band_of_Brothers
Ressi
10-09-2010, 09:14 AM
"Kif, I'm going to the bathroom and need an attendant... oh, I'm sorry. You're crying. Like a woman." - Captain Zapp Brannigan
Hello seeker! Now don't feel alone here in the New Age, because there's a seeker born every minute. ~ Firesign Theatre
An intellectual is a man who takes more words than necessary to tell more than he knows. ~ Dwight D. Eisenhower (1890 - 1969)
Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job. ~ Douglas Adams (1952 - 2001
Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion. I myself prefer to laugh, since there is less cleaning up to do afterward. ~ Kurt Vonnegut (1922 - 2007)
Dorella Allerod
10-22-2010, 10:57 PM
We can never wash out the older things as they are what made the things in which to come. ~ Dorella Allerod
To my embarrassment I was born in bed with a lady. ~ Wilson Mizner (1876 - 1933)
At times one remains faithful to a cause only because its opponents do not cease to be insipid. ~ Friedrich Nietzsche (1844 - 1900)
Events in the past may be roughly divided into those which probably never happened and those which do not matter. ~ William Ralph Inge (1860 - 1954)
The danger is not that a particular class is unfit to govern. Every class is unfit to govern. ~ Lord Acton 1881
Valentine
10-28-2010, 02:50 PM
>Always aim at complete harmony of thought and word and deed. Always aim at purifying your thoughts and everything will be well.
>I believe in equality for everyone, except reporters and photographers.
>Freedom is not worth having if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes.
>It is better to be violent, if there is violence in our hearts, than to put on the cloak of nonviolence to cover impotence.
Mahatma Gandhi
(who contrary to common knowledge actually spent significant time as an expensive suit wearing, status symbol acquiring lawyer in Capetown and London... )
>It is my belief that foreign travel narrows the mind wonderfully." - Attributed to Helem Bosch
>War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things. The decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feeling which thinks that nothing is worth war is much worse. The person who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which is more important than his own personal safety, is a miserable creature and has no chance of being free unless made and kept so by the exertions of better men than himself.
John Stuart Mill (1806 - 1873)
Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business. ~ Tom Robbins (1936 - )
No one who cannot rejoice in the discovery of his own mistakes deserves to be called a scholar. ~ Donald Foster
There is no abstract art. You must always start with something. Afterward you can remove all traces of reality. ~ Pablo Picasso (1881 - 1973)
Nothing is more admirable than the fortitude with which millionaires tolerate the disadvantages of their wealth. ~ Rex Stout (1886 - 1975)
Sometime they'll give a war and nobody will come. ~ Carl Sandburg (1878 - 1967)
She had a pretty gift for quotation, which is a serviceable substitute for wit. ~ W. Somerset Maugham (1874 - 1965)
We live in a Newtonian world of Einsteinian physics ruled by Frankenstein logic. ~ David Russell
Everybody hates me because I'm so universally liked. ~ Peter de Vries
You can't have a light without a dark to stick it in. ~ Arlo Guthrie (1947 - )
If at first you don't succeed, find out if the loser gets anything. ~ Bill Lyon
Mistakes are a part of being human. Appreciate your mistakes for what they are: precious life lessons that can only be learned the hard way. Unless it's a fatal mistake, which, at least, others can learn from. ~ Al Franken
Every great advance in natural knowledge has involved the absolute rejection of authority. ~ Thomas H. Huxley (1825 - 1895)
Ressi
11-10-2010, 02:10 AM
"I am the man with no name. Captain Zapp Brannigan at your service." - Zapp Brannigan
"You mean Earth?"
"Indubitably, but we call it blue, blue, shiny ball." - Evil Cats bent on taking over the Earth (Futurama)
"Oh, a lesson in not changing history from Mr. I'm My Own Grandpa! Screw history!" - Hubert J. Farnsworth, aka the Professor
Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water. ~ W. C. Fields (1880 - 1946)
It is very strange that the years teach us patience - that the shorter our time, the greater our capacity for waiting. ~ Elizabeth Taylor (1932 -
He makes people pleased with him by making them first pleased with themselves. ~ Lord Chesterfield (1694 - 1773)
Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love, though I'd stepped in it a few times. ~ Rita Rudner
People have a hard time letting go of their suffering. Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer suffering that is familiar. ~ Thich Nhat Hanh
Don't stay long when the husband is not at home. ~ Japanese Proverb
One swallow does not make a summer, neither does one fine day; similarly one day or brief time of happiness does not make a person entirely happy. ~ Aristotle (384 BC - 322 BC)
There are no whole truths; all truths are half- truths. It is trying to treat them as whole truths that plays the devil. ~ Alfred North Whitehead (1861 - 1947)
The moment of victory is much too short to live for that and nothing else. ~ Martina Navratilova (1956 - )
Almost everything--all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure--these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart. ~ Steve Jobs (1955 - )
If we discover a desire within us that nothing in this world can satisfy, also we should begin to wonder if perhaps we were created for another world. ~ C. S. Lewis (1898 - 1963)
Ressi
11-11-2010, 07:45 PM
"And if history doesn't care that our degenerate friend Fry here is his own grandpa then who are we to judge?" - Hubert J. Farnsworth
There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line. ~ Oscar Levant (1906 - 1972)
Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers. ~ T. S. Eliot (1888 - 1965)
You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public. ~ Scott Adams (1957 - )
I don't generally feel anything until noon; then it's time for my nap. ~ Bob Hope (1903 - 2003)
Ressi
11-20-2010, 01:12 AM
"Armless bandit! Empty your bladder of that bitter black urine men call coffee! It has its price and that price has been paid! (he slams machine back onto the ground; it delivers a cup of coffee) Java devil, you are now my *****. Well, here you are, weary traveler, one steaming hot cup of justice." - The Tick
If little else, the brain is an educational toy. ~ Tom Robbins (1936 - )
Someday we'll look back on this moment and plow into a parked car. ~ Evan Davis
Don't ever take a fence down until you know the reason it was put up. ~ G. K. Chesterton (1874 - 1936)
Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted. ~ Martin Luther King Jr. (1929 - 1968 )
Ressi
11-20-2010, 08:19 PM
"The life of a superhero is a lonely one, filled with hardship and danger. The few who answer the call must leave comfort, safety, and often sanity behind. But someone's gotta stand the heat and stay in the kitchen. Someone's gotta don the oven mitts of all that's right and strangle the red-hot throat of all that's wrong." - The Tick
Ressi
11-21-2010, 10:41 AM
"Death. The eternal blink. The capricious dance of Now You Stop Moving Forever. Well, contrary to popular belief, death isn't just for dead people. It can happen to anyone. I know, it's news to me too. And it's not just people either, it's all kinds of stuff. Horses, fiddler crabs. Did you know that even a potato... can die?" - The Tick
Where a calculator on the ENIAC is equipped with 18,000 vacuum tubes and weighs 30 tons, computers in the future may have only 1,000 vaccuum tubes and perhaps weigh 1.5 tons. ~ unknown, Popular Mechanics, March 1949
In a few minutes a computer can make a mistake so great that it would have taken many men many months to equal it. ~ Unknown
I think computer viruses should count as life. I think it says something about human nature that the only form of life we have created so far is purely destructive. We've created life in our own image. ~ Stephen Hawking (1942 - )
If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside. ~ Robert X. Cringely
If you put tomfoolery into a computer, nothing comes out of it but tomfoolery. But this tomfoolery, having passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow ennobled and no-one dares criticize it. ~ Pierre Gallois
Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning. ~ Rick Cook
Computers are useless. They can only give you answers. ~ Pablo Picasso (1881 - 1973)
There is no reason for any individual to have a computer in his home. ~ Ken Olsen (1926 - ), President, Digital Equipment, 1977
Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining. ~ Jef Raskin
The most overlooked advantage to owning a computer is that if they foul up there's no law against wacking them around a little. ~ Joe Martin, Porterfield
One would think that if you're anonymous, you'd do anything you want, but groups have their own sense of community and what we can do. ~ John Allen, A network called 'Internet', CBC, 10-08-93
If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into a committee -- that will do them in. ~ Bradley's Bromide
Why is it drug addicts and computer afficionados are both called users? ~ Clifford Stoll
Ressi
11-22-2010, 12:38 AM
"How much math do you need to clean house, wash clothes, and cook meals?" - Christine Carty (a friend of mine complaining about having to take a math class)
"Your partner picks away at the Affirmative Case with a little hammer, then Sean hits the Affirmative case in the 2 [Negative Constructive Speech] with a nuclear device and obliterates it." - Unknown Debate Judge
"You're turning pages backward! And then you turn like 80 pages at once. Ha ha! (Doesn't matter, just a funny observation :))" - Jessica Redmond's D.I. (Dramatic Interpretation) Ballot on my D.I. at State... I finished next to last, but I wasn't last.
"God, that tie is hideous. I'd suggest burning it." - Truman State Debate Coach on a Persuade Ballot, he still voted for me.
"Delivery: Self Confidence, Initiative, and Assertiveness - 9 out of a possible 5 points." - PBL Impromtu Ballot... I finished 2nd in the Nation that year... I was disappointed to not be first.
Ressi
11-22-2010, 08:55 PM
"Prescription, of course. They're like the nuclear weapons of the drug world." - Me
Ressi
11-25-2010, 02:25 AM
"And, isn't sanity really just a one-trick pony anyway? I mean all you get is one trick, rational thinking, but when you're good and crazy, oooh, oooh, oooh, the sky is the limit." - The Tick
Correct me if I'm wrong, but hasn't the fine line between sanity and madness gotten finer? ~ George Price
No opera plot can be sensible, for people do not sing when they are feeling sensible. ~ W. H. Auden (1907 - 1973)
In every work of genius we recognize our own rejected thoughts; they come back to us with a certain alienated majesty. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 - 1882)
College isn't the place to go for ideas. ~ Helen Keller (1880 - 1968)
We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming. ~ Wernher von Braun (1912 - 1977)
A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. ~ Mignon McLaughlin
He had learned over the years that poor people did not feel so poor when allowed to give occasionally. ~ Lawana Blackwell
Oil prices have fallen lately. We include this news for the benefit of gas stations, which otherwise wouldn't learn of it for six months. ~ Bill Tammeus
I am prepared to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter. ~ Sir Winston Churchill (1874 - 1965
Illusion is the first of all pleasures. ~ Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900)
The more original a discovery, the more obvious it seems afterwards. ~ Arthur Koestler (1905 - 1983)
You must learn from the mistakes of others. You can't possibly live long enough to make them all yourself. ~ Sam Levenson (1911 - 1980)
Ressi
11-27-2010, 11:13 AM
"Nothin' says lovin' like scents from the oven." - Pillsbury Doughboy
"A toll's a toll, and a roll's a roll and if we don't get no tolls, we don't eat no rolls." - Little John
Ressi
11-28-2010, 11:57 AM
"At least I have chicken." - Leeroy Jenkins
Professional assassination. It's the highest form of public service. ~ Chiun
Remo Williams: You know, Chiun, there are times when I really like you.
Chiun: Of course. I am Chiun.
Remo Williams: And there are times when I could really kill you.
Chiun: Good. We will practice that after dinner.
Chiun: It would be better for you to eat this can than what is inside of it. Why must everything in this country be coated with monositi-... monosoti...
Remo Williams: Monosodium glutamate. You can't even say it.
Chiun: I can say "rat droppings." That does not mean I want to eat them.
It is well that war is so terrible - otherwise we would grow too fond of it. ~ Robert E. Lee (1807 - 1870)
Only the mediocre are always at their best. ~ Jean Giraudoux (1882 - 1944)
If you believe everything you read, better not read. ~ Japanese Proverb
Contrary to general belief, I do not believe that friends are necessarily the people you like best, they are merely the people who got there first. ~ Peter Ustinov (1921 - 2004)
Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first. ~ Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found. ~ Calvin Trillin (1935 - )
If mankind minus one were of one opinion, then mankind is no more justified in silencing the one than the one - if he had the power - would be justified in silencing mankind. ~ John Stuart Mill (1806 - 1873)
The smaller the mind the greater the conceit. ~ Aesop (620 BC - 560 BC)
Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs? ~ Spike Milligan
Partying is such sweet sorrow. ~ Robert Byrne
You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist. ~ Indira Gandhi (1917 - 1984)
The only thing that lasts longer than a friend's love is the stupidity that keeps us from knowing any better. ~ Randy K. Milholland
Ressi
12-04-2010, 07:36 PM
"WOLVERINES!" - Red Dawn
The Colonel: All that hate's gonna burn you up, kid.
Robert: It keeps me warm.
~ Red Dawn
Valentine
12-05-2010, 03:28 AM
"Why does she fight so hard? She doesn't want to win. "
Prince Tarn, Red Sonja
Ressi
12-05-2010, 02:05 PM
"Now, lets move on to who built the pyramids. The running theory at the moment is that the Goa'ould built them as landing pads for their spaceships. Stargate reference number one." - Dr. James Smith, Ancient Near East, said during lecture
"I'm going to tell you about a Valentine's Day Present I have for all of you... the first exam!" - Dr. Bob Klostermeyer, State and Local Government, said in class
"It’s sort of a theory that has been embraced in Spain during this time, though it was dismissed in America except by the nutcase that shot William McKinley… and that’s anarchism." - Dr. Tim Wood, Recent U.S. History, said during lecture
"One way of achieving change is to protest. 'Hey, hey, ho, ho American Government has got to go!'" - Dr. Kwasi Ofori-Yeboah, American Government, said during lecture
And there we have some nuggets from each of my four primary college professors.
Ressi
12-06-2010, 09:28 PM
Dr. Smith: "In this class we have two classes of advisee. We have those that I thank God every day are NOT my advisees..."
T.J.: "Yo!"
Dr. Smith: *sigh* "Then we have the class of advisee that I ask God everyday... 'Why me'?"
Me: "WOOOOOOO!!!!"
Ressi
12-07-2010, 12:42 PM
"You know the government used to make people get blood tests before marriage." - Klostermeyer
Student says "Wasn't that to make sure your blood type or genes were compatible."
"No it was to track STDs." - Klosteryemer
Student: "Do you know the statistics of how many Americans have a STD?"
For a few days that student's raised hand was noted by Klostermeyer with "Yes Mr. Spradling, what do you have to add to the conversation besides how to lead a disease free life?"
Ressi
12-08-2010, 02:04 AM
"It's called a candelabra, not a Candelabramawitz. Your father thinks he's funny." - An Argyle Sweater (Comic)
At least I think it was that one.
Ressi
12-09-2010, 03:06 AM
"But now that you are here we have a great strength of feet." - A Sneeze
"I'm not following you." - Robin Hood
Two dingings do not a rowboat make ~ Emilie Fernandez
Fools names like fools faces, often seen in public places ~ Emilie Fernandez
Fish and company, both stink after three days ~ Emilie Fernandez
Familiarity breeds contempt ~ Emilie Fernandez
Ressi
12-11-2010, 11:54 AM
"I apologize for the font. It’s called Creepy Font, with blood dripping from the letters. But, for whatever reason the SBU computers here don’t recognize it. So, it doesn’t look nearly as creepy." - Dr. Kelly Martin, Serial Killers Class, Southwest Baptist University
Yes, we really had a class called Serial Killers as a Criminal Justice course offering. Fun class.
Operationally, God is beginning to resemble not a ruler but the last fading smile of a cosmic Cheshire cat. ~ Sir Julian Huxley (1887 - 1975)
If you are not criticized, you may not be doing much. ~ Donald H. Rumsfeld (1932 - ), US Secretary of Defense
In certain kinds of writing, particularly in art criticism and literary criticism, it is normal to come across long passages which are almost completely lacking in meaning. ~ George Orwell (1903 - 1950)
I look at what the phone company does and do the opposite. ~ Craig Newmark (1952 - )
Ressi
12-12-2010, 10:06 AM
"I've been watching you like a dingo watches a human baby." - Hal, Megamind
Poor Tony, he didn't deserve this, he was just a solder in a war he started. ~Homer Simmson
Ressi
12-13-2010, 04:56 PM
"Wait, I know how to do this! Dearly Beloved we are gathered here, today, to witness, the joining together of Tex, and Church, in eternalness together, smuh- speak now, or forever rest in peace! With liberty… and justice… for all. The end!" - Caboose, Red vs. Blue
I never know how much of what I say is true. ~ Bette Midler (1945 - )
This book fills a much-needed gap. ~ Moses Hadas (1900 - 1966)
If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail. ~ Abraham Maslow (1908 - 1970)
Patriotism is often an arbitrary veneration of real estate above principles. ~ George Jean Nathan (1882 - 1958)
Ressi
12-14-2010, 07:23 PM
"Last time I got shot, I got a purple heart. Next time I want to get a purple lung. You see, I want to make a complete purple person. And we will be best friends." - Caboose, Red vs. Blue
The release of atomic energy has not created a new problem. It has merely made more urgent the necessity of solving an existing one. ~ Albert Einstein (1879 - 1955)
Nothing succeeds like the appearance of success. ~ Christopher Lasch
He attacked everything in life with a mix of extraordinary genius and naive incompetence, and it was often difficult to tell which was which. ~ Douglas Adams (1952 - 2001)
Many a man who falls in love with a dimple make the mistake of marrying the whole girl. ~ Evan Esar (1899 - 1995)
Ressi
12-16-2010, 02:34 AM
"Your toast has been burned and no amount of scraping will remove the black part!" - Caboose
The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not 'Eureka!' (I found it!) but 'That's funny ...' ~ Isaac Asimov (1920 - 1992)
Truth is beautiful, without doubt; but so are lies. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 - 1882)
Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some hire public relations officers. ~ Daniel J. Boorstin (1914 - )
It has yet to be proven that intelligence has any survival value. ~ Arthur C. Clarke (1917 - )
Ressi
12-23-2010, 12:50 AM
"Command... Oh no... they never have good news. Did somebody die, was it my mom is she dead or my dad, did my dad die again. Oh no... Wait, did my brother die? Oh god thats it isn't it? My brother is dead! [Washington: No it's nothing like that] Oh good, because I don't even have a brother. How horrible would it be to not have a brother and lose a brother all in the same day." - Caboose, Red vs. Blue
You know everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects. ~ Will Rogers (1879 - 1935
Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish. ~ Euripides (484 BC - 406 BC)
Government is too big and too important to be left to the politicians. ~ Chester Bowles (1901 - 1986)
The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun. ~ P. G. Wodehouse (1881 - 1975)
Ressi
12-25-2010, 09:38 AM
"Yes... And from the darkness, there came... Someone! And that person was me! And I said... Funerals are sad! So let's have a birthday party instead! Yes! Let there be cake! Hallelujah! Gesundheit." - Caboose
I have an existential map. It has 'You are here' written all over it. ~ Steven Wright (1955 - )
It is true that I was born in Iowa, but I can't speak for my twin sister. ~ Abigail Van Buren (1918 - ), (Dear Abby)
The skill of writing is to create a context in which other people can think. ~ Edwin Schlossberg
Books to the ceiling,
Books to the sky,
My pile of books is a mile high.
How I love them! How I need them!
I'll have a long beard by the time I read them.
~ Arnold Lobel
Ressi
12-26-2010, 09:37 AM
"A toll's a toll, and a roll's a roll. And, if we don't get no tolls, we don't eat no rolls. I made that last part up meself." - Little John, Robin Hood: Men in Tights
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